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Today, I realized how bad my OCD is when I accidentally got a paper cut and I was annoyed by the fact that the cut wasn't in a straight line. FML

#20927328
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41919) - you deserved it (6254)

On 10/20/2013 at 10:34am - health - by Teiu88 (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my best friend went in for her scheduled mammogram, and I sent her a text saying, "How're your boobies?" It was only after I sent it that I realized I'd sent it to my history professor. FML

#20930198
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38714) - you deserved it (11496)

On 10/22/2013 at 12:47pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

#20927261
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59363) - you deserved it (4528)

On 10/20/2013 at 9:02am - intimacy - by Female_Lucifer (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up and coughed up the spider I thought I'd killed last night. FML

#20986479
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56207) - you deserved it (4774)

On 12/09/2013 at 4:01pm - misc - by igotpride - United States

Today, I woke up and screamed: My older sister had placed a Furby right by my face while I was asleep. This is a common occurrence. FML

#20964432
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37822) - you deserved it (4489)

On 11/20/2013 at 11:27am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, some kid asked me if I was Mexican. After I explained to him that I was actually Venezuelan, he simply snorted and said, "That's the same f*cking thing. If you speak Spanish then you're Mexican." FML

#20939700
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46689) - you deserved it (5310)

On 10/30/2013 at 10:59pm - misc - by Rinelric1998 (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

#20974515
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55927) - you deserved it (6063)

On 11/29/2013 at 6:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my cat has figured out that while I'm good at sleeping through her nagging in the early morning hours, I will unfailingly wake up for my baby. FML

Today, I dyed my hair. And my forehead. And my ears. And my arms. And my hands. FML

Today, I lost a bet with my grandma, and now she's coming with me on my next date. FML

#21020870
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35339) - you deserved it (31937)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:21pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML

#21031414
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49352) - you deserved it (9287)

On 01/18/2014 at 1:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I had to basically ground my own husband, after he tricked our 6-year-old son into getting his tongue stuck to a frozen pole. FML

#21000259
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41278) - you deserved it (4398)

On 12/21/2013 at 2:13pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden

Today, I overheard my boyfriend bragging to his friend about finally giving me an orgasm yesterday, but that he got scared because my orgasm face made me look like "a camel having a stroke." FML

#21007355
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44998) - you deserved it (5114)

On 12/27/2013 at 3:18pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Jamaica (Saint Andrew)



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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