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Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML

#19892376
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26430) - you deserved it (5372)

On 07/04/2012 at 8:50pm - money - by jenjam (woman) -

Today, my mum came to my ballet class. She spent the whole lesson sitting at the back yelling at me to "stop sticking your butt out". My ballet instructor had to ask her several times to pipe down. FML

#20495701
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28184) - you deserved it (2230)

On 02/06/2013 at 1:57pm - misc - by embarassinggg (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my estranged father, with whom I haven't spoken in years, called me and demanded to know where his Father's Day gift was. FML

#20729234
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43927) - you deserved it (3199)

On 06/16/2013 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, after mowing my neighbor's lawn for 3 years for free without being asked to, he finally came out while I was in the middle of it. Expecting a "Thank you" or some cash, he instead said, "You missed a spot" and walked back inside. FML

Today, my one-night stand decided he wanted to meet my parents. FML

#20895300
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36590) - you deserved it (12980)

On 09/25/2013 at 2:59am - love - by so_screwed - United States (California)

Today, one of my online friends told me he's bought a plane ticket, so he can come visit me. I've told him multiple times before that I'm uncomfortable with this idea, but he keeps telling me to stop joking, and reminding me that he'll have no other place to stay. FML

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

#20887758
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40305) - you deserved it (3064)

On 09/19/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

#20899091
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47844) - you deserved it (4148)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Serbia

Today, I started training as a bartender. My very first client told me how his wife is sleeping with her sister's husband. He then told me that all the women he knows only want sex, and asked me why "we" were like that. He could be my dad. FML

#20924792
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43423) - you deserved it (4592)

On 10/18/2013 at 1:14am - intimacy - by nerdywaitress (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents, despite my long-standing protests. Over the next hour, they asked her if she'd ever considered becoming a swinger, why not, if she'd ever consider it in future, and to keep them in mind if she does. FML

#20959018
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39883) - you deserved it (2892)

On 11/15/2013 at 7:10pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to tell McDonald's that my 11-year-old son thought it would be funny to take a dump in the urinal. I then had to clean it up. FML

#20994572
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38957) - you deserved it (13036)

On 12/16/2013 at 11:34am - kids - by failedfather (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, after months of looking at cribs and picking out the perfect one for my unborn daughter, the store informed me that they no longer make that crib, even though the model is right there on the sales floor. I had to leave as my hormones got the best of me and I started bawling. FML

Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML

#21078266
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43281) - you deserved it (7029)

On 03/04/2014 at 9:46pm - misc - by augiedd (man) - United States (Illinois)



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