Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I finally went to the DMV to replace my lost license. After waiting for almost two hours, I casually rummaged through my purse. Something strange inside the lining caught my eye. It was my license. FML

#19932233
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9477) - you deserved it (24753)

On 07/13/2012 at 11:19am - misc - by HellisLikeTheDMV (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML

#20122351
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23317) - you deserved it (1696)

On 10/18/2012 at 10:41am - animals - by Annonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while talking to my boyfriend, he got upset and accused me of making up words to make him feel stupid. All because I used the word "vapid." FML

#20414233
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25834) - you deserved it (7085)

On 12/22/2012 at 5:19pm - misc - by seriously? (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML

#20595392
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25148) - you deserved it (44972)

On 04/16/2013 at 12:01am - money - by LoLWut?? nd Why?? - United States

Today, is the day of the biggest concert in the state of Florida, and it's also my birthday. I was so excited to hear my mom got tickets. It was for her boyfriend and her. I'm stuck at home babysitting. FML

#20589773
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54775) - you deserved it (4103)

On 04/14/2013 at 9:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, some jackass in an Iron Man mask nailed me in the head with a quarter while I was helping other customers. Minimum wage isn't worth this crap. FML

#20696570
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42096) - you deserved it (3552)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:05am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML

#20761277
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46526) - you deserved it (5035)

On 07/03/2013 at 5:09am - work - by melons (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML

#20902940
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42112) - you deserved it (6538)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:36am - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I met a really nice girl at a club. One thing led to another, and she told me to meet her out front in 5 minutes. I was so drunk that I stumbled into the restroom instead, then curled up on the floor crying in despair when I realized my mistake. FML

#20907372
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20721) - you deserved it (40758)

On 10/04/2013 at 4:25pm - misc - by vcarder (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I realized I can't wait until my daughter moves out the house when she is 18. She is eight. FML

#20923587
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37205) - you deserved it (27013)

On 10/17/2013 at 1:51am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

#20944161
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41794) - you deserved it (4573)

On 11/03/2013 at 5:27pm - kids - by don'tdrinkthat - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered that when one of my toddlers throws up, the other sympathy-pukes too, and that this continues until they're both empty. I guess my car is going to stink of vomit for a while. FML

#21057222
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42969) - you deserved it (3485)

On 02/11/2014 at 2:10pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I found out that my son set up a telescope in the attic not so he could study astronomy like he told me, but so he could spy on the girl across the street. FML

#21070645
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35030) - you deserved it (6603)

On 02/24/2014 at 7:51pm - kids - by sonwhy - United States (Illinois)



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: