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Today, I made it my life goal to own a towel heater. FML

#16262012
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10139) - you deserved it (26733)

On 05/20/2011 at 12:43am - misc - by Ahlph -

Today, while serving drinks at work to a group of people getting tipsy on wine, I joked about it being obvious who the designated driver was to the only gentleman who'd been religiously sticking to coke all night. He coldly informed me that he was a recovering alcoholic. FML

#15403907
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30003) - you deserved it (15083)

On 03/20/2011 at 7:29pm - work - by AwkwardWaitress (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was confronted by my father after I got back home from a party in the early hours. He demanded to know if I'd been doing any drugs, and then decided to give me a scare lecture on the dangers of alcohol. I'd had a few beers. He had the smell of tequila on his breath. FML

#17874555
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25490) - you deserved it (4836)

On 09/30/2011 at 10:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to clean my face of unwanted visitors, and spent my shower popping the pimples on my cheeks. Twenty minutes later, I remembered that I was showering ahead of a date with my girlfriend. My cheeks now look like the crater-filled surface of Mars. FML

#20066193
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19240) - you deserved it (11983)

On 09/10/2012 at 12:19pm - health - by greeple - Singapore

Today, after having taken hormone tablets to try to increase my cup size, I realized that I've basically reversed my menopause. FML

#19975577
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6256) - you deserved it (32075)

On 07/22/2012 at 3:25pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband was planning on getting me my favorite movie as an anniversary present; I ended up buying it. He had to give me the money and leave because he is severely arachnophobic and couldn't even pick up the box. I have to hide the movie for fear of it being destroyed. Again. FML

#20134119
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18015) - you deserved it (4070)

On 10/26/2012 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, while at work, a customer gave me a $20 tip. I explained to him we aren't allowed to accept tips, but he insisted. When I called the manager to report it, he pocketed my tip. FML

#20157115
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14409) - you deserved it (28816)

On 11/10/2012 at 2:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after hours of trying to put a screaming baby to sleep, she finally fell asleep in my arms. I was so happy. Then, I got the hiccups. FML

#20456464
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33013) - you deserved it (2697)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:15am - kids - by hiccups - United States (Connecticut)

Today, at 24, I still can't grow a single bit of facial hair. Well, at least not on the right side of my face. FML

#20481856
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28755) - you deserved it (2286)

On 01/27/2013 at 8:08pm - health - by ihatemylife - United States (Illinois)

Today, my brother's friend was about to drive home drunk, so I convinced him to think and not be stupid. It wasn't an invitation to puke on my floor then try to crawl into bed with me. FML

#20655778
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44963) - you deserved it (5627)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:52am - misc - by GaveAnInchTakeAMile (woman) - United States

Today, the massive bogey that had been dangling precariously from my manager's nose for half an hour finally detached itself. Into my coffee. FML

#20761277
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47366) - you deserved it (5120)

On 07/03/2013 at 5:09am - work - by melons (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML

#20902940
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44117) - you deserved it (6796)

On 10/01/2013 at 1:36am - love - by anonymous (man) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, someone stole my umbrella. It was pouring heavily, and I was using it at the time. FML

#20914908
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41735) - you deserved it (3167)

On 10/10/2013 at 7:27am - misc - by happyturtle (woman) - Croatia



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