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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I bought a nice new dress for a work party. But when I went in, a coworker hurried me into the bathroom saying, "Don't worry we can fix this." She thought someone had been sick on me. Thanks. That was just the pattern of the dress. FML

#6023107
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26059) - you deserved it (6721)

On 10/27/2009 at 12:43pm - work - by yper (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I fell asleep on the train and accidentally wound up resting my head on a strange man's shoulder. When I woke up, I discovered that not only did he not object, but he decided to return the favor by resting his hand on my thigh. I was wearing a skirt. FML

#6676625
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11769) - you deserved it (17305)

On 12/09/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Violated (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, it is New Year's Day. While all of my friends are out partying, I stayed home and mastered level 34 on FarmVille. FML

#7075240
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12206) - you deserved it (34530)

On 01/01/2010 at 3:16am - misc - by thatsjustlovely (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I noticed that my ceiling was sagging slightly. I got up on to a chair to look at it more closely, and I touched it. Turns out that my ceiling was full of water. It went everywhere, ruining my new iPod, phone, and all the things my daughter bought for university. FML

#8375974
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26261) - you deserved it (4323)

On 02/17/2010 at 3:18pm - misc - by ceilingssuck (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, after threatening my son for weeks that if he didn't clean his room, I would, I went in, equipped with a garbage bag, ready to throw away everything I found, only to discover dozens of empty bottles, two partially empty pizza boxes, Taco Bell wrappers, and cockroaches. FML

#8824498
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22019) - you deserved it (15959)

On 03/04/2010 at 3:01pm - kids - by disguested (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to spend all of my money on textbooks even though my refrigerator is empty. Starving and frustrated, I called home to ask for money for groceries. My mom told me I could afford to skip a few meals. FML

#15089569
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31388) - you deserved it (5414)

On 02/23/2011 at 11:04am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I came back to my room and sat down at my desk to find pile short, curly hairs on it. Neither me or my roommate have curly hair, and it isn't mine. I think he trimmed his pubes over my desk and forgot to clean it up. FML

#9171257
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24194) - you deserved it (2500)

On 03/17/2010 at 9:55pm - intimacy - by pubes (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I woke up very excited because I was going on my first date with this guy I really liked. I dressed very nicely and went to where we were supposed to meet. I waited for about 2 hours. I called him to ask him where he was. He got angry because he was still sleeping and I woke him up. FML

#12998632
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33690) - you deserved it (3537)

On 09/11/2010 at 12:47am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my mother noticed that I hadn't taken the trash out in a few weeks and angry, piled various full trash bags on my bed. I've been away on holiday for the past three weeks, I guess she didn't notice that part. FML

#15195848
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34265) - you deserved it (3364)

On 03/04/2011 at 11:25am - misc - by carr (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I stepped outdoors for a minute. The wind blew the door shut, locking me outside. I've spent the last two hours pounding frantically on the windows, trying to wake my 4 year old son who is inside. I can see him sleeping soundly on the couch. FML

#15938297
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28088) - you deserved it (5696)

On 04/26/2011 at 7:11pm - misc - by gottapee (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I thought I was going to my doctor for a yearly check-up. My father had actually tricked me into therapy. FML

#19323093
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19230) - you deserved it (3283)

On 03/21/2012 at 9:50pm - health - by nazooer - United States

Today, my grandmother's graduation presents came for my sisters. Not only did she remember to send them cards, but money too. My graduation was a year ago, I received nothing, and last time she saw me, she didn't know my name. FML

Today, I got a really bad cramp while I was swimming in my neighborhood pool. I started to go under until the lifeguard jumped in and saved me. I guess it would have been great, if I wasn't a fellow lifeguard. FML

#16215643
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29135) - you deserved it (5814)

On 05/16/2011 at 11:26pm - misc - by t -



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