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Today, while working security at a welfare office, I had to listen as a claimant gushed about her upcoming Caribbean cruise. I work two jobs and haven't had a vacation since 2006. FML

#20092291
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21975) - you deserved it (1552)

On 09/28/2012 at 1:40pm - work - by getajob (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, a cop turned his lights and siren on to pull me over. I pulled into a parking lot and got a ticket. It wasn't until the cop pulled away that I realized that I'd pulled into, and interrupted, an on-going funeral visitation. FML

#19847830
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17503) - you deserved it (4126)

On 06/25/2012 at 11:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was walking down the street, when I saw a guy in front of me trip and fall forwards, and I quickly jumped forward to steady him. Apparently he thought he was being mugged, and threw his head backwards into my face, leaving my nose a bloody mess. FML

#19793138
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19181) - you deserved it (1950)

On 06/15/2012 at 4:23pm - misc - by shalara (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, as I pulled to a halt at a stop sign, a cyclist ripped through the air, slammed straight into my fender, and almost launched over my car. I ended up being cited for reckless driving. FML

#19597798
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15841) - you deserved it (1320)

On 05/09/2012 at 2:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, a co-worker gave me a couple of CDs he said he wanted me to listen to. I got excited, thinking that they were playlists he'd made for me. They were self-help tracks. FML

#20104274
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14852) - you deserved it (1761)

On 10/06/2012 at 1:09pm - work - by The Last Cockbender (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, in a drunken, depressed state I thought I heard my deceased mother trying to make contact with me from beyond the grave. It took me a moment to realise that the soft voice was from the music my neighbours were playing. FML

#19847673
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16154) - you deserved it (5417)

On 06/25/2012 at 10:59pm - misc - by hearingthings (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had to call in sick to work because I was experiencing bowel distress. I called my manager's phone directly so no one else would know of my embarrassment. She put me on speakerphone, and I only realized when the juvenile laughter started. FML

#20109013
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17298) - you deserved it (1613)

On 10/09/2012 at 12:07pm - work - by yolo is for shitheads - United States

Today, I was babysitting three kids, one of whom was particularly difficult to control. While trying to get him to behave, the two girls came up behind me and pulled my pants down. In front of a huge window open to the street below. FML

#19994550
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16074) - you deserved it (1828)

On 07/31/2012 at 1:43pm - kids - by 1D-107 - United States (Utah)

Today, I found myself actively concerned about what the characters from "Will and Grace" have been doing since the show went off the air. FML

#20011081
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4932) - you deserved it (12065)

On 08/09/2012 at 6:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while shopping, I bumped into a guy I knew in high school. He went on about he heard I'd got married, looked like I'd had a baby, and that, "she looks just like you!" The kid was my niece, and my husband broke up with me 2 years ago. Thanks for bringing that up. FML

#19838088
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17510) - you deserved it (4223)

On 06/24/2012 at 6:57am - misc - by thankspal (woman) - United States

Today, I moved back home after unsuccessfully trying to find work in Florida, despite living there for nine months. About 45 minutes into my 18-hour drive home, a TV station called me to offer me a job interview. I applied for that job over three months ago. FML

#19883197
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18767) - you deserved it (1765)

On 07/02/2012 at 10:22pm - work - by deweyd8855 - United States

Today, I was once again passed over for a promotion. I'm now the assistant to a kid who has failed to meet almost every single responsibility he's been given before. It's my job to make sure he's successful, and if he isn't, I'll lose my job. FML

#19807859
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22504) - you deserved it (1645)

On 06/18/2012 at 3:49pm - misc - by wenchfucker (man) - France (Lorraine)

Today, I went on a field trip with some people from school. I'm currently confined to a wheelchair, so I had to rely on my sister to get around. She eventually went off with her friends, assuming that the people nearby would keep me company. Five minutes later, they'd all left me. FML

#20135712
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21380) - you deserved it (1562)

On 10/27/2012 at 4:04pm - misc - by left4dead (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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