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Today, I'm on a medication that really dehydrates my skin. I thought split lips were the worst side effects. Other split orifices make a trip to the toilet a literal pain in the arse. No sign of stopping in the near future. FML

#18560228
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22456) - you deserved it (2010)

On 12/20/2011 at 7:46am - health - by ouch (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I wound up cleaning vomit out of the window track of my car at midnight, in the nicest dress I own, after my husband got completely wasted at his office Christmas party. FML

#18474443
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22762) - you deserved it (2843)

On 12/10/2011 at 5:14am - misc - by dee - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was about to drive out of a parking lot. The space in front of me was empty, so I figured I could drive forward. I'd not noticed that there was a median in front, and my car got stuck. FML

#17508471
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7414) - you deserved it (26531)

On 08/18/2011 at 9:07am - misc - by Lousydriver (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to pee in the kitchen sink because my bathroom is being completely revamped, and the only other toilet in the house is my parents'. They refuse to let anyone use it. FML

#19032094
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24043) - you deserved it (2390)

On 02/09/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by Falcon - United States (Arizona)

Today, I moved into a lovely basement suite. Unfortunately, the 12 year old upstairs plays violin. She also plays baritone. She said she alternates each day. FML

#18278500
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20804) - you deserved it (2626)

On 11/18/2011 at 12:54am - misc - by guest - Canada

Today, I walk into my grandma's house after having a fabulous lunch with a few friends. The first thing I hear is "Be a dear and help me change my colostomy bag." I lost that fabulous lunch. FML

#18295282
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22226) - you deserved it (3583)

On 11/20/2011 at 2:37am - misc - by NoThanksGrandma (woman) -

Today, I went to the emergency room with chest pain. I didn't have a heart attack, but I now have a broken nose after passing out and face-planting in the waiting room. FML

#19952787
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17718) - you deserved it (1670)

On 07/18/2012 at 1:06am - health - by tm - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I had to give a speech as part of my campaign for school captain. I was rather happy with it and so I told another candidate my speech. Apparently it was a good idea as minutes later that same candidate stole my entire speech, leaving me looking like a complete idiot. FML

#20058690
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8615) - you deserved it (32094)

On 09/05/2012 at 9:51am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I let my imbecile of a brother borrow my car. The keys to his car are now jammed into the ignition of mine. FML

#19821564
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20703) - you deserved it (4203)

On 06/20/2012 at 11:44pm - misc - by thesmartone - United States

Today, after spending about 5 grand on my home studio over the past year, I realized I have no musical talent whatsoever. FML

#19660967
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7048) - you deserved it (32977)

On 05/22/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by gaga - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend drove to my house to break up with me. He only did so after I'd vacuumed the whole house to compensate for his cat allergies. I thought he was just coming to dinner. FML

#19325462
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21506) - you deserved it (2167)

On 03/22/2012 at 8:06am - love - by Ima in Hungary (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to admit that I hate the wedding dress that I've designed. My wedding is in a week. FML

#19469447
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8012) - you deserved it (25655)

On 04/14/2012 at 11:02pm - misc - by al (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML

#19699076
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18095) - you deserved it (1535)

On 05/29/2012 at 1:52pm - work - by vikts (man) - Luxembourg (Luxembourg)



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