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Today, after the two week winter break, I went back to school to find that the bookbag that I'd left in my car was covered in some creepy, pink gooey stuff. Under the freezing conditions, my lotion had exploded all over my notes and bag. FML

#7150726
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8781) - you deserved it (18652)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:02pm - misc - by bandcamp926 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I used a public bathroom and set my motorcycle helmet on the sink while I used the urinal. The helmet rolled into the sink, under the faucet and set off the motion detector, soaking the inside. I drove 15 miles home in 30 degree weather with a wet helmet. FML

#7351038
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20915) - you deserved it (8310)

On 01/15/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by RyanSmithN (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sitting on the train wondering what that putrid smell was. As I got off the train I realized there was vomit all over the back of my seat. FML

#8082566
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24664) - you deserved it (4024)

On 02/10/2010 at 6:47am - love - by kstaa - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I opened my closet to get my uniform to get ready for work, and found the cat my step-mom was looking for the night before. Apparently, it snuck in there and was too stupid to miaow to be let out, but had no problem pissing all over all my stuff. FML

#8741941
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21330) - you deserved it (2835)

On 03/01/2010 at 3:30am - animals - by mav3rick91 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got a call from the police saying they found my stolen car. Not only did I not know my car was stolen, but it was completely stripped. No tires or doors left, and the engine was taken apart. FML

#8331359
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24593) - you deserved it (1884)

On 02/16/2010 at 4:37am - money - by troyrm85 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was so bored at work that I put a zip tie on my finger just for the excitement of trying to get it off. FML

#8880583
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7444) - you deserved it (18059)

On 03/06/2010 at 10:56pm - work - by Maxx (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my neighbor gets more pleasure out of me and my husband having it off then I do. FML

#8382778
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15655) - you deserved it (2196)

On 02/17/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by noosher0990 -

Today, I realized that the only things I gained from my masters programs are more debt and the knowledge that you can use a semicolon in a list. FML

#8437472
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18638) - you deserved it (4804)

On 02/19/2010 at 7:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML

#8622338
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17709) - you deserved it (5247)

On 02/24/2010 at 7:57pm - work - by Herman - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was working the night shift at the hotel I'm employed at. After checking in a young couple to the room above the main office, I was forced to listen to them having it off for most of the night, serving a very loud reminder that I've been single for five years. FML

#8582830
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18977) - you deserved it (2790)

On 02/23/2010 at 6:52am - intimacy - by Cromwel620 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my most amazing spring break ever, will be spent stuck on a ship with my ex. It's been almost two years, and he still isn't over me. Yay. This cruise shall be fun. FML

#8542819
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21222) - you deserved it (5568)

On 02/22/2010 at 1:31am - love - by nomoresbfun (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after leaving work at 10 pm, I took a shortcut to the highway. After getting lost, my GPS informed me that the service was unavailable and I should try back in an hour. This occurred moments before I ran out of gas. FML

#8861127
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20772) - you deserved it (7541)

On 03/06/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by Lost... (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to sit and listen to the guy in the next cube brag to his wife about the promotion he just received. The promotion my boss told me last week that I was going to get. FML

#10942679
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30771) - you deserved it (2315)

On 06/03/2010 at 11:45am - work - by Greg - United States



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