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Today, I saw a news story about how wearing flip-flops is dangerous. I scoffed at the ridiculou study and went about mah business. Three hours later I accidentally ripped off mah toenail. While wearing flip-flops. FML

#19980407
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10870) - you deserved it (19689)

On 07/23/2012 at 10:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States

Yesterday... mah wife told me she'd rather bust up concrete than get it on with me. FML

#19907709
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25015) - you deserved it (3519)

On 07/08/2012 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I ava a massiva aadaca, tanks to ma assat of a roommata, wo dacidad to balanca our taa kattla on ta top of ta kitcan door . Wan I stumblad into ta kitcan, alf-awaka, it cama smasing down onto ma aad . FML

#20103084
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19018) - you deserved it (1668)

On 10/05/2012 at 4:25pm - health - by sharky (man) - United States

Today, at age eighteen, I finished moving out of parents' house an into own. The only person to even remotely give a shit was sister, an that was only cuz I was taking the cat with me. FML

#20026624
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20090) - you deserved it (2002)

On 08/17/2012 at 3:55pm - misc - by CollegeBound (man) - United States (New York)

Today I went to Waffle House to talk to the manager about getting a job. My boyfriend now wants to beat up the manager 4 giving me his number so that I looool can call him whenever I'm done filling in the application. FML

#20085651
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17501) - you deserved it (2964)

On 09/23/2012 at 8:26pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alabama)

Today , I saw mah crush working the only open till at the grocery store. When she saw me approach her queue , she immediately called 4 more cashiers. mega FML

#19823688
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21217) - you deserved it (3026)

On 06/21/2012 at 11:40am - love - by rink.attendant.6 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I'm apparently so desperate 4 companionship that body has subconsciously synced period with the grl who works in the cubicle adjacent to mine. FML

#20044589
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16632) - you deserved it (2420)

On 08/27/2012 at 2:20pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

today I had a doctor's appointment!! I left with referrals to both a dermatologist an a mental health professional!! FML

#19986925
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17920) - you deserved it (2327)

On 07/27/2012 at 5:24am - health - by lexithepirate - United States

Yesterday , I was talking to an art critic at an exhibition. He told me that the artist had no talent and went on to tell me everything wrong with each painting. I'd painted them all. FML

#20065231
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20078) - you deserved it (2086)

On 09/09/2012 at 8:12pm - work - by the bad artist - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, mah boyfriend broke up with me cuz I'm too "high maintenance". And that's cuz I ask him to use condomshen we have sex, and I refuse to invite mah friends over fir threesomes. I don't knowhy I'm not actually glad we r broken up. FML

#20445835
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27134) - you deserved it (5311)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:35am - love - by kat124ever (woman) - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)

Today, the grl of dreams asked me if I wanted to go biking with her. ( Just the two of us, ) she said. I had to turn her down cuz I'm 17 years old an never learned how to ride a bike. FML

#20457168
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26391) - you deserved it (35470)

On 01/13/2013 at 1:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today... mah husband suggested a way 4 us to "make some money" off our pregnancy. His great idea? Pregnancy porn. FML

#20456391
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39579) - you deserved it (4639)

On 01/13/2013 at 12:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I was laughing at a grl who really sucks at badminton . Turns out she has anger issues, an a really good aim when she's mad . I've never been hit so hard in the crotch before . FML

#20450098
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9996) - you deserved it (59549)

On 01/09/2013 at 2:27pm - misc - by Anon - United States (Connecticut)



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