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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, I bought a laptop so that I could have dirty video chats with my internet girlfriend. I got home only to find that the only place I can get a decent wifi signal is in front of my mom's room. FML

#6851938
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7143) - you deserved it (19128)

On 12/20/2009 at 7:20pm - intimacy - by thatguy (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend asked me why I looked sad. I told him that I found out a co-worker died over the weekend and I failed my final exam. He then informed me that my toilet was clogged again, that he had a lot of work to do, and left. I have to find a plunger. FML

#6760578
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23991) - you deserved it (2650)

On 12/15/2009 at 2:10am - misc - by Scat (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was setting up comcast cable boxes for my house. I had the packaging everywhere when I finished. Looking admirably at my job, I backed out my door, and stepped on bubble wrap, scaring myself. I flailed, fell, reached out, grabbing one of the cable wires. I pulled the cable box and my modem off. FML

#7099836
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8229) - you deserved it (18251)

On 01/02/2010 at 4:18am - misc - by cmilla (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, after the two week winter break, I went back to school to find that the bookbag that I'd left in my car was covered in some creepy, pink gooey stuff. Under the freezing conditions, my lotion had exploded all over my notes and bag. FML

#7150726
21 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8746) - you deserved it (18584)

On 01/04/2010 at 8:02pm - misc - by bandcamp926 - United States (Ohio)

Today, I used a public bathroom and set my motorcycle helmet on the sink while I used the urinal. The helmet rolled into the sink, under the faucet and set off the motion detector, soaking the inside. I drove 15 miles home in 30 degree weather with a wet helmet. FML

#7351038
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20814) - you deserved it (8303)

On 01/15/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by RyanSmithN (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sitting on the train wondering what that putrid smell was. As I got off the train I realized there was vomit all over the back of my seat. FML

#8082566
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23779) - you deserved it (3912)

On 02/10/2010 at 6:47am - love - by kstaa - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got a call from the police saying they found my stolen car. Not only did I not know my car was stolen, but it was completely stripped. No tires or doors left, and the engine was taken apart. FML

#8331359
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24489) - you deserved it (1880)

On 02/16/2010 at 4:37am - money - by troyrm85 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I realized for the last year that my husband has been home from Iraq, I haven't gotten more than a few hours of sleep at night. Not because he gets nightmares, but because he now snores so loud that the pets sleep at the other end of the house to get rest. FML

#8190091
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18266) - you deserved it (2696)

On 02/13/2010 at 12:23am - misc - by xetsa - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was on a date with a guy I met online. After 30 minutes, he abruptly stands up and says he has to leave. He practically ran out of Starbucks to get away from me. FML

#8795495
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21867) - you deserved it (6272)

On 03/03/2010 at 8:21am - love - by Carrie - United States

Today, I was so bored at work that I put a zip tie on my finger just for the excitement of trying to get it off. FML

#8880583
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7413) - you deserved it (17992)

On 03/06/2010 at 10:56pm - work - by Maxx (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out that my neighbor gets more pleasure out of me and my husband having it off then I do. FML

#8382778
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15555) - you deserved it (2185)

On 02/17/2010 at 7:30pm - intimacy - by noosher0990 -

Today, I realized that the only things I gained from my masters programs are more debt and the knowledge that you can use a semicolon in a list. FML

#8437472
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18553) - you deserved it (4794)

On 02/19/2010 at 7:03am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a guy at work told me to, "Relax, dude", All. Day. Long. FML

#8622338
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17627) - you deserved it (5238)

On 02/24/2010 at 7:57pm - work - by Herman - Sent from mobile version



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