Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I pulled into a parking lot and waited for a car to back out so I could take their spot. The apparently batshit insane psychopath in the other car managed to completely overlook me waving him out, and backed straight into my car. FML

#19002086
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18410) - you deserved it (4501)

On 02/05/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to my favorite drive-in burger joint for dinner. As I was nearing the end of my burger, I grabbed a cup from the cup holder that I thought was filled with soda. Instead, I got a mouthful of dip spit that a friend left in my car. FML

#17697276
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28029) - you deserved it (7032)

On 09/08/2011 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, after a long and tiring day at work, I went to the movies, loaded up on soda, popcorn, and candy. I ended up falling asleep and being woken up two hours later by an usher. FML

#16732224
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22755) - you deserved it (7468)

On 06/18/2011 at 5:49pm - misc - by Stormy - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I got a call from my manager saying that I won't need to work this weekend. Too bad I already cancelled a family vacation because he threatened to fire me if I didn't work this weekend. FML

#19998359
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23625) - you deserved it (1357)

On 08/02/2012 at 12:22pm - work - by Pizzaguy (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while in Holland, I lost the bag with my passport, debit and credit cards, license, and camera. I froze my accounts and filled out the paperwork for a new passport. My bag was found the second time I went to the police, with everything in it. Now my accounts are frozen for the 3 weeks I'm here. FML

#16562666
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30609) - you deserved it (6503)

On 06/08/2011 at 1:52pm - misc - by misc (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I asked to change my major at the college I'm transferring to in the fall. Instead of letting me change my major, they withdrew my acceptance. FML

#16486485
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32117) - you deserved it (4133)

On 06/03/2011 at 5:34pm - misc - by transfer (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I drove my boyfriend to hospital because he felt extremely ill. His buddies had gotten their hands on a taser, and he had the brilliant idea of being shot as part of a Youtube stunt video. Now I have an empty gas tank and have to clean up a puddle of vomit in my living room. FML

#16377162
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26298) - you deserved it (3289)

On 05/27/2011 at 8:04pm - misc - by moron - United States

Today, after our old roommate left because he was too dirty for us to live with anymore, we found out that our new roommate has "borrowed" our shampoo, towel, toilet paper, liquor, without replacing them. I wish we still only had to clean up. FML

#17506977
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20066) - you deserved it (3765)

On 08/18/2011 at 2:59am - misc - by upset room mate - United States (Texas)

Today, I spent an hour cleaning my already-clean house to avoid any form of conversation with my boyfriend. FML

#19071135
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9041) - you deserved it (22992)

On 02/14/2012 at 1:50am - love - by kiwi023 (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my parents want me to become a lawyer, all because our family members keep getting into feuds and court cases. I'm a successful developer, and run my own company. FML

#18782870
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21366) - you deserved it (2081)

On 01/12/2012 at 5:14am - work - by me_the_maniak - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I gave my husband an expensive watch. The first words out of his mouth were, "You didn't use our joint bank account for this, right?" He then asked if I still had the receipt. FML

#19309374
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20904) - you deserved it (4819)

On 03/19/2012 at 7:50pm - money - by moneycatious (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I saw my 22-year-old boyfriend blow his nose into his hand, then wipe his snot on our couch. There was a box of tissues directly in front of him. FML

#19374256
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22300) - you deserved it (3027)

On 03/30/2012 at 1:37am - misc - by rozziepop - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend told me that because he works fifty hours a week, I should be meeting an arbitrary quota of fifty hours of housework, and if I don't, I'm insensitive and ungrateful. FML

#19895787
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20429) - you deserved it (9198)

On 07/05/2012 at 3:34pm - work - by lazy pregnant girl - United States



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: