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Today, I had such a violent coughing fit that my stomach emptied itself all over the floor while at my sales job. FML

#15500531
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26990) - you deserved it (2795)

On 03/26/2011 at 4:54pm - work - by burntloyalty - United States

Today, I found myself humming a Skrillex ditty all day. I'm beginning to wonder if I've had some sort of stroke. FML

#19497404
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13630) - you deserved it (5144)

On 04/19/2012 at 8:12pm - misc - by WTF? (man) - United States

Today, after shopping alone at a grocery store, I was taking my groceries back to my car when a kid grabbed one of my bags and ran. Deciding not to risk leaving the rest of my groceries stranded, I didn't chase him. Later, I realized that was the bag my credit card was in. FML

#15943696
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30491) - you deserved it (15885)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21am - money - by uncbballwins -

Today, I found out that the weird lump on my eye is benign. That would be great news but they aren't going to treat it at all. Now I look like I'm high all the time. FML

#16016823
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23615) - you deserved it (2510)

On 05/02/2011 at 6:58am - health - by anon (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after a spate of bad ones, I was in another job interview trying my hardest to give a good impression. After answering a few questions, I realized to my horror that while I was talking I was swiveling my chair from left to right like a nervous child. FML

#19748854
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18165) - you deserved it (4017)

On 06/07/2012 at 8:17am - work - by Swivel - Singapore

Today, I fell asleep and dreamed that I had won $500,000. In my dream, I used this money to buy a new MP3 Player, and then put the rest in a term deposit. Even in my dreams, I'm the most boring person I know. FML

#10448158
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28217) - you deserved it (7261)

On 05/10/2010 at 6:14am - money - by boring (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, it was a warm day out so I left my car windows slightly open while I was at work. One of the local bums apparently thought this was a perfect opportunity to use my open driver's side window as a barf receptacle. FML

#17340796
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24230) - you deserved it (8850)

On 08/02/2011 at 3:55am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I broke my right leg. I've had one shot of morphine, and even that only relieved the pain a little. It's now totally worn off and I have yet to get pain medication of any kind. My leg has been broken for over nine hours now. FML

#17592683
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27316) - you deserved it (3745)

On 08/27/2011 at 4:12am - health - by Anonymous - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I was called an 'unhelpful little bitch' by a customer, after I informed her that we couldn't order a pair of shoes she wanted from the company in her size because it's a discontinued model. This little tirade continued for another few minutes, with her insulting me and my intelligence. FML

#19014850
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23777) - you deserved it (2131)

On 02/06/2012 at 11:27pm - work - by Unhelpful (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after a long and tiring day at work, I went to the movies, loaded up on soda, popcorn, and candy. I ended up falling asleep and being woken up two hours later by an usher. FML

#16732224
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23433) - you deserved it (7571)

On 06/18/2011 at 5:49pm - misc - by Stormy - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was at the dentist. During my check-up, he recommended a dermatologist. FML

#19393124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21180) - you deserved it (2583)

On 04/02/2012 at 1:59am - health - by bdogge99 - United States (Washington)

Today, I broke my arm, and posted a picture of my X-ray on Facebook to show everyone how bad the break is. Nobody even asked me if I was OK. FML

#18724146
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15040) - you deserved it (34604)

On 01/06/2012 at 5:27am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I'm so sick that I'm drinking fluids just to make it hurt less when I puke. FML

#19195188
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24802) - you deserved it (2090)

On 03/01/2012 at 11:17am - health - by cmoney6452 - United States (Ohio)



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