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Today, I met this really nice guy at the mall and he gave me his number. Later that night, I texted him. We got on the subject of food, and I started talking about how much I love veal. He responded with saying I was supporting animal murder, that I should go to hell and lose his number. FML

#2449996
384 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45254) - you deserved it (20084)

On 05/30/2009 at 11:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML

#5181151
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9846) - you deserved it (41598)

On 09/11/2009 at 12:39am - misc - by 0ptimu5 (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, a friend and I drove all the way from Texas to a small town in Colorado to spend an entire uninterrupted night together. Not only did he forget to bring condoms but everything was closed by the time we got into town. We ended up playing cards on the bed instead. FML

#4299529
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17543) - you deserved it (44301)

On 08/05/2009 at 1:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, the Fire Department found my car overturned in a ditch and on fire. It was two miles away from where I parked it about three hours ago. FML

#5635477
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39705) - you deserved it (2208)

On 10/04/2009 at 1:48am - money - by ThatTrafficCone (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I saw photos of my boyfriend at his 25th birthday party. The one he told me was cancelled. FML

#5659886
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45570) - you deserved it (3380)

On 10/05/2009 at 9:55am - love - by Konstantine (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, as a customer was trying on some outfits, I looked over at her husband for his opinion. The response I got? Him licking his lips. Just then his wife looked up to see me gawking at him in shock. She yelled at me to close my legs and stop checking out her man. FML

Today, my friends and I were shopping for dresses. I asked the lady at the counter for a size 4, she looked at me and mumbled "Yeah right." in front of everyone. FML

#6933189
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29523) - you deserved it (5064)

On 12/25/2009 at 1:30am - misc - by hahasuckit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend told me he hasn't showered since our first date. We've been dating for three weeks. FML

#7541798
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33306) - you deserved it (4643)

On 01/24/2010 at 10:27am - misc - by unknown - Sent from mobile version

Today, I learned the hard way why they say "four on the floor" at school. I leaned too far back while rocking in the chair and fell off. I grabbed the desk to save myself and it came down too. FML

#7475785
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7070) - you deserved it (32898)

On 01/21/2010 at 3:16pm - misc - by jalapeno_popper (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after work, I peeled a parking ticket off my windshield. It was so hot that the ink from the ticket made a stamp on my windshield. Now I have a permanent reminder staring me in the face wherever I drive. FML

#12081632
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26980) - you deserved it (7602)

On 07/24/2010 at 5:49am - work - by wils (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was trying to swat a wasp in my bedroom. I got so frustrated that I ended up punching myself in the face. The wasp is still here, and now I look like I've been in a brawl. FML

#14250956
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9820) - you deserved it (27886)

On 12/18/2010 at 6:47pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my phone decided to delete all my numbers. I posted on Facebook that people should message or text me if they felt like I should have their number. I didn't get a single reply. FML

#14825701
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34118) - you deserved it (6413)

On 02/03/2011 at 11:42am - misc - by Kere (man) - Sweden (Hallands Lan)

Today, I was getting a flight home. I'd worn a belt because my skirt was too big. When I walked through security, they asked me to remove my belt. My skirt fell down in front of everyone. FML

#14731232
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26138) - you deserved it (12870)

On 01/27/2011 at 11:48am - misc - by roo - United Kingdom



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