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Today, as a customer was trying on some outfits, I looked over at her husband for his opinion. The response I got? Him licking his lips. Just then his wife looked up to see me gawking at him in shock. She yelled at me to close my legs and stop checking out her man. FML

Today, in my psychology class, we were given a sheet that had a list of stressful events and we were to select the ones we had experienced in the last 12 months. I got highest in my class of above an 80% chance of getting a life threatening illness due to stress. Everyone laughed. FML

#8160504
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25359) - you deserved it (2927)

On 02/12/2010 at 6:39am - health - by Stressy (man) - United Kingdom (Coventry)

Today, my nose was really stuffy. I heard somewhere that inhaling tea steam clears up the nose. While reading a magazine I inhaled my cup of green tea steam, without knowing that slowly I was moving my cup closer to my nose. Hot tea was sucked into my left nostril and burned the inside badly. FML

#12985084
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9949) - you deserved it (33490)

On 09/10/2010 at 12:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was trying to swat a wasp in my bedroom. I got so frustrated that I ended up punching myself in the face. The wasp is still here, and now I look like I've been in a brawl. FML

#14250956
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9466) - you deserved it (27154)

On 12/18/2010 at 6:47pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while babysitting, I brought over some colouring-in sheets as an activity. I said that I should bring some Christmas-themed ones for next time. The little girl then turned to me and said "If there is a next time." I've been put on probation by an 8-year-old. FML

#13936248
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23980) - you deserved it (3858)

On 11/22/2010 at 11:33am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I waited in line at a drive-through behind a man for ten minutes. I got out of my car, cursed at him, and then asked him to give me one good reason why it would take that long to order. The man slowly explained to me that he had a stutter. FML

#10903041
421 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10919) - you deserved it (124402)

On 06/01/2010 at 5:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I thought I might need some anger-management classes, after I punched a hole in a kitchen cabinet when my dog wouldn't stop yapping every time the rooster my neighbors just got made a noise. FML

#17518682
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11080) - you deserved it (26493)

On 08/19/2011 at 11:08am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was getting a flight home. I'd worn a belt because my skirt was too big. When I walked through security, they asked me to remove my belt. My skirt fell down in front of everyone. FML

#14731232
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24875) - you deserved it (12487)

On 01/27/2011 at 11:48am - misc - by roo - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a bug on a stranger's arm and as a knee-jerk reaction smacked it. It took me a second before I realized it was actually a loose scab. FML

#20057702
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7118) - you deserved it (22307)

On 09/04/2012 at 6:02pm - misc - by CantPublish - United States

Today, I got an email from my seminar tutor asking why I wasn't in class. I was sitting next to him. FML

#14924630
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28302) - you deserved it (2719)

On 02/10/2011 at 5:48pm - misc - by JaneVI (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was fired. My boss told me via email that it was because I "don't have enough experience with fun spiritual." Uh, what? FML

#15092237
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28044) - you deserved it (2517)

On 02/23/2011 at 5:36pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, after I sent around 300 entries to a competition hosted by a deodorant company where the main prize is a trip to Hawaii, spending around 5 hours sending the entries, I won a deodorant. FML

#18526839
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12007) - you deserved it (34395)

On 12/16/2011 at 9:59am - money - by mr.nobody (woman) - Cyprus (Nicosia)

Today, my professor handed me back a paper I spent hours upon hours working on. At the bottom in red it said "D" followed by, "that was a gift." FML

#16666880
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27368) - you deserved it (7668)

On 06/14/2011 at 8:59pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)



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