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Today, I lost my keys. My roommate locked me out, then yelled at me when I made her come home to let me in. I tore my room apart searching for them, and even went out to search my locker room. When I got home, I glanced at my wall only to find my keys hanging on the hook I set up specifically for them. FML

#18559487
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6797) - you deserved it (32839)

On 12/20/2011 at 3:14am - misc - by phansmootchie (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at the microbiology lab, I discovered that the guy who took the shift before me didn't sterilize the work space very well. I am now blowing chunks from both ends from a very nasty strain of E. Coli. My company blames me. FML

#18502844
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28930) - you deserved it (2809)

On 12/13/2011 at 12:33pm - work - by microtech - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that I won't be able to wear the dress with a low neck line that I bought for my cousin's wedding, because my older brother thought it would be funny to mix a scented body-wash that he knows makes my skin break out in hives, with my regular one. My chest looks like a pizza. FML

#17518141
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26602) - you deserved it (2450)

On 08/19/2011 at 9:11am - health - by pizzachest - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's Friday the 13th. I've never been superstitious, and I figured it would be a normal day, that is until my hot water heater exploded and rained water into my downstairs neighbour's apartment for two hours before anyone noticed. FML

#18795817
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21375) - you deserved it (2004)

On 01/13/2012 at 1:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, after finally returning to my house after over a year overseas, I found that my neighbours built a wall covering the only window in my bedroom. Not only is my room eternally musty and pitch black, but the council won't accept my complaint, because apparently my window was illegally built. FML

#19072736
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22347) - you deserved it (1931)

On 02/14/2012 at 9:42am - misc - by BLAH (woman) - Philippines

Today, I started my job as one of those sign spinners. About an hour later, some people drove up, yelled, "Bitch, get off my corner," and threw water balloons at me. My boss made me keep working in the soaking wet outfit. FML

#19637949
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20428) - you deserved it (2249)

On 05/17/2012 at 6:02pm - work - by poseidon5213 - United States (California)

Today, I still can't find a job to support myself. The only experience I have is a month in retail and a summer spent in a kitchen de-pooping shrimp. FML

#19333832
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17858) - you deserved it (3492)

On 03/23/2012 at 5:46pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went to interview with potential new roommates at a cooperative living house. I decided to bake cookies for everyone, and while touring the house, I forgot about the cookies and set off a small oven fire. All this after professing how responsible I am. FML

#17716770
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18698) - you deserved it (12118)

On 09/11/2011 at 1:58am - misc - by dangit (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to pee in the kitchen sink because my bathroom is being completely revamped, and the only other toilet in the house is my parents'. They refuse to let anyone use it. FML

#19032094
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24575) - you deserved it (2424)

On 02/09/2012 at 1:42am - misc - by Falcon - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out I have to give my father-in-law back the football tickets he gave me for my birthday. Why? His girlfriend decided she wanted to go. He didn't get me a different gift. FML

#18434015
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23917) - you deserved it (2079)

On 12/05/2011 at 1:57am - misc - by Sal (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was diagnosed with vertigo. It's like being perpetually drunk, but without any of the fun bits. FML

#18725965
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24109) - you deserved it (2036)

On 01/06/2012 at 12:51pm - health - by aylla - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, my husband and I went on vacation. We got lost and had to ask the locals for directions to our hotel. Neither of us could understand their accents, and we ended up wandering around blindly for hours until we made it back on our own. FML

#19578116
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9224) - you deserved it (17370)

On 05/05/2012 at 5:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, in a rush to squeeze out of a particularly tight parking spot, I made a hurried 12-point turn. Just to make sure I had enough room behind, I hopped out of my car. It was still in reverse. I managed to wreck my own car without even sitting in it. FML

#19556658
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5681) - you deserved it (22966)

On 05/01/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by tandc (man) - United States



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