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Today, I arrived at work, only to find my computer's massive CRT monitor had been smashed up beyond belief. Everyone else has flat-screen monitors, and I'd made no secret of how unfair it is to me. According to my boss, this makes me the obvious culprit, and now I'm suspended. FML

#19473815
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24262) - you deserved it (2322)

On 04/15/2012 at 5:26pm - work - by ... (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my fiancé and I appeared in the paper for obtaining our marriage license. In the same column half way down his parents appeared for filing their marriage dissolution petition. FML

#19571944
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17661) - you deserved it (1595)

On 05/04/2012 at 3:19am - love - by Queen_Dread - United States (Washington)

Today, I received a call from the company I applied to, only to have my father pick it up and make fun of the man's accent. They won't call me back or take any of my calls, and my dad is completely unapologetic. FML

#19384586
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23983) - you deserved it (1649)

On 03/31/2012 at 9:00pm - work - by Bashit (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after weeks of sorting, inspecting, and waiting, my high school's yearbooks were distributed. I'd searched carefully for photo errors and was proud to say there were none. That is, until someone told me that a boy on the last page was flipping the camera the bird. FML

#19642956
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16843) - you deserved it (4142)

On 05/18/2012 at 5:50pm - misc - by ooh cat - United States (California)

Today, I locked my car. I put the key in my bag when suddenly my car began to roll backwards. I tried to get the key out of my bag but couldn't find it, and with the other hand I tried to stop the car. The worst thing was that some dumbass was watching me and didn't help. FML

#19499444
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11325) - you deserved it (17995)

On 04/20/2012 at 2:41am - misc - by rabbitoncocaine (woman) - Germany (Thuringen)

Today, I went into Whole Foods asking if they carried a supplement called Carnosine. The girl assisting me had no idea what it was, but asked, "Is this for weight loss?" FML

#19656281
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20403) - you deserved it (4107)

On 05/21/2012 at 8:10am - health - by medosin (woman) - Austria

Today, I found out the hard way that it is possible to sunburn the soles of your feet. FML

#19628540
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17741) - you deserved it (4502)

On 05/15/2012 at 6:39pm - health - by Leadamp (man) -

Today, I realized the only reason why my boyfriend spends the night with me is because my house is closer to his job than his, and so he saves money on gas. FML

#20107548
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21824) - you deserved it (2649)

On 10/08/2012 at 2:57pm - love - by habsgurl0622 - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was eating out at a restaurant with my family. My dad had drained most of our bottle of wine, so thinking he'd be a little less uptight than usual, I reached over to pour myself some. He swatted my hand away and started yelling at me for being a "degenerate drunk". FML

#20091024
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16584) - you deserved it (5584)

On 09/27/2012 at 2:36pm - misc - by fuck you, dad (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, my mother met my boyfriend. She thought it would be appropriate to tell him that he looks just like my ex-husband. FML

#19859656
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21517) - you deserved it (2447)

On 06/28/2012 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML

#20006315
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5302) - you deserved it (25394)

On 08/06/2012 at 7:25pm - misc - by maybenot (man) - United Kingdom

Today, my swimming coach made us swim fifty laps non-stop as punishment for his previous class being unable to swim a drill properly. They're 8-11 year olds who are still learning to swim. I feel like my arms and legs are filled with lead. FML

#20041381
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21169) - you deserved it (1909)

On 08/25/2012 at 5:59pm - health - by blue (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was at work, when an elderly lady casually mentioned it was her birthday. I motioned two of my coworkers over, and we sang a little happy birthday to her over the phone. Our boss stormed in mid-song and suspended all three of us on the spot for "unprofessional behavior." FML

#20082592
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23638) - you deserved it (2337)

On 09/21/2012 at 8:28pm - work - by karmas a kunt (man) - United States



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