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Today, my boss made me work a longer shift than usual. Not because he needed me in, but just so I'd finish at the same time as his brat of a son, and give him a lift home. FML

#19522593
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23528) - you deserved it (1774)

On 04/24/2012 at 4:15pm - work - by Mug - United Kingdom

Today, the company I applied for called up congratulating me in getting the job. I was ecstatic. Quickly enough I texted a few mates that I'd got the job. Twenty minutes later they called again saying the trainee had accidentally called the wrong applicant. FML

#14786523
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28976) - you deserved it (2553)

On 01/31/2011 at 10:44am - misc - by kkkk -

Today, I was eating breakfast at an IHOP. As I was eating, the old man sitting directly behind me started discussing every aspect of his spastic colon, in vivid detail. FML

#14809738
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20293) - you deserved it (2612)

On 02/02/2011 at 9:30am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after having stayed up all night studying, all the coffee I'd drank to keep me awake hit my gut with a vengeance. I ended up missing two exams because I was emptying my bowels into the toilet all morning. FML

#19792230
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17379) - you deserved it (8433)

On 06/15/2012 at 12:41pm - misc - by eminem blows cock (woman) - Ireland (Kerry)

Today, working at a daycare centre, when packing up the kids' beds after sleep time, I slipped and landed in a puddle. Of urine. I had no spare pants. I had to wear them for the rest of my shift. FML

#18459141
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22206) - you deserved it (2758)

On 12/08/2011 at 7:40am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I learned the hard way not to take off your shirt with a toothpick in your mouth. FML

#19521815
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6898) - you deserved it (25223)

On 04/24/2012 at 12:36pm - health - by monkeycannon7 - United States (Virginia)

Today, after months of looking forward to my new fencing lessons and speculating endlessly about the people who might be in my class, I went to my first lesson. I was the only one who showed up. FML

#17739609
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20827) - you deserved it (2951)

On 09/13/2011 at 9:30pm - misc - by ManinBlack (man) - Canada

Today, I broke my collarbone in a rugby tournament. I was forced to sit through five more hours of games because the coach wouldn't take me to the hospital until the tournament was over. FML

#16929999
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31358) - you deserved it (3170)

On 07/01/2011 at 12:15am - health - by nico (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at my grandparents' house, when the power went out. Even though we were supplied with candles and flashlights, we still had to stumble around in the darkness. They'd left both the candles and flashlights in the pitch black, unnavigable basement. FML

#17654474
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20235) - you deserved it (2684)

On 09/03/2011 at 4:52pm - misc - by itsgonnabealongnight... (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I used a fire extinguisher for the first time. Too bad it was on my car. FML

#16523437
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26029) - you deserved it (3181)

On 06/06/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Username - United States

Today, I offered to drive my girlfriend's grandpa to the doctor. I thus learned my girlfriend's grandfather has a colostomy bag when it burst all over the inside of my truck. FML

#16247260
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32252) - you deserved it (2852)

On 05/19/2011 at 12:27am - misc - by John -

Today, I woke up with a splitting headache. I have no idea what happened the night before, except for the fact that I'd tucked two uncapped vodka bottles into bed beside me, and now my room reeks of a Russian sorority house. FML

#19417580
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5959) - you deserved it (22425)

On 04/06/2012 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, my future mother-in-law told me she thought I was severely allergic to cigarette smoke. That hasn't stopped her from chain-smoking around me for the last 3 years. FML

#19447044
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20525) - you deserved it (1761)

On 04/10/2012 at 11:49pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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