Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got the repair estimate for my car. It is going to cost me $3,000 to rebuild the front end. It was wrecked because a couple decided to have a lovers spat in the middle of the freeway. I had that car for exactly four hours. FML

#6527838
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28323) - you deserved it (2251)

On 11/30/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by Dante (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got an email from the Law School Admissions Council saying that they received my request for my LSAT cancellation and they are confirming that it has been cancelled. The email also said the score will not be reinstated for any reason. I never requested for my score to be cancelled. FML

#6751692
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28097) - you deserved it (1829)

On 12/14/2009 at 12:20pm - misc - by dahlia87 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out the gift card my friend gave me for Christmas actually has no money on it and was never purchased in the first place. FML

#6958051
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24903) - you deserved it (1944)

On 12/26/2009 at 3:48pm - misc - by DeannaMarie - United States (Florida)

Today, I took the train home. When seated, I suddenly noticed something wet on my seat. Without looking, I thought it was water since it was snowing outside. Guess again. It was vomit. FML

#6868813
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24097) - you deserved it (6336)

On 12/21/2009 at 5:36pm - misc - by herzausstein (man) - Belgium (Limburg)

Today, I remembered my mom got her carpet cleaned and to be careful while she was at work. To be nice, I vacuumed the whole house. Feeling proud of myself, I got a drink and went upstairs. I tripped and spilled red Kool-Aid all over the floor. FML

#6976718
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21478) - you deserved it (12585)

On 12/27/2009 at 5:25pm - misc - by xMiSS_CuTiEx (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was getting ready for a party and accidentally knocked my blender off the counter. After taking a half an hour to clean up all the glass, I went upstairs to get the spare blender I keep in the closet. I tripped, and broke the blender. I just applied for a waitressing job. FML

#7115601
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20989) - you deserved it (5815)

On 01/03/2010 at 12:04am - misc - by cutiepatootie (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, formal portraits of my entire class were posted online, with about five photos per person. As my mom was looking at them, she was commenting about how pretty all my classmates look. When she got to my photos, all she had to say was "ugh". FML

#7222160
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21451) - you deserved it (2191)

On 01/08/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out my happily married father has been hiring escorts on-line for 3 years. FML

#7517323
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17127) - you deserved it (2082)

On 01/23/2010 at 7:21am - intimacy - by T.C (woman) - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, I slid on ice and hit another car while driving to work. My car was totalled, and my leg hurt, while the other car had very little damage. Not two minutes later, the salt truck drove by, spraying the road. FML

#7275776
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22449) - you deserved it (3001)

On 01/11/2010 at 8:43am - misc - by wrecked (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was loading a very large box into my hatchback. I was really struggling, and a few people walked by and laughed. Then a car pulled up and waited for the spot. There isn't a spring to hold my trunk open, so it slammed onto my head. Twice. The car honked for me to hurry up. FML

#8729495
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21932) - you deserved it (2011)

On 02/28/2010 at 8:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my husband and I were going to have sex for the first time since having our baby, who was taking a nap. As soon as we lay down in bed, his mother rang saying she was five minutes away. FML

#8663414
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22243) - you deserved it (2077)

On 02/26/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by Ineedit (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to give a speech but I wasn't prepared. I decided to give it anyway. While giving the speech, I got so nervous I passed out. FML

#8770202
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20110) - you deserved it (7761)

On 03/02/2010 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, while working at my new job at a veterinary hospital, I was excited that I set a urinary catheter in a dog for the first time. I guess I was a little too enthusiastic though, because I pulled it out too fast and bloody urine splashed up all over my face. FML

#8336704
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7343) - you deserved it (27897)

On 02/16/2010 at 11:43am - work - by alex (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)



Idan Schneider's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Idan Schneider's illustrated FML
  • Oi! Stop "playing" that digeridoo and get out! There, now that I've tidied up my apartment, we can begin. How are you all doing? Have you got your leather jacket out of storage to go hang out down at…

Thursday 22 January 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: