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Today, while I was volunteering at the homeless shelter, one of them "accidentally" kissed me. It felt like my face was being sucked by a vacuum. FML

#19948204
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19439) - you deserved it (1681)

On 07/17/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Quebec)

Today, my best friend and I broke up with our respective girlfriends, so we could go on holiday and meet lots of new women. Instead, within a few hours, he got back with his ex, and they're planning their own holiday together. FML

#19801303
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6757) - you deserved it (51814)

On 06/17/2012 at 12:08pm - love - by JPTK (man) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I attended my 10-year high school reunion. My ex-husband's new wife showed up in the same dress as mine. I guess both the dress and my ex-husband look better on her. FML

#20055300
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24807) - you deserved it (2075)

On 09/03/2012 at 4:17am - love - by ugly (woman) - United States

Today, my roommate decided to turn off all appliances in the house to "save" electricity. This included the refrigerator. FML

#20088101
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19829) - you deserved it (1249)

On 09/25/2012 at 1:13pm - misc - by Jograd - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I brought my new puppy home. I saw her sniffing around, so I took her outside to do her business. She simply played in the grass for ten minutes, so I brought her in. She walked in the door, squatted, and shit. She has diarrhea. This is the fourth time today. FML

#20115908
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18572) - you deserved it (3175)

On 10/14/2012 at 12:39am - animals - by Patrick - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was so engrossed in a phone call that I drove off without pumping gas after I'd prepaid $50. FML

#20121962
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6893) - you deserved it (36972)

On 10/18/2012 at 12:50am - money - by Dr_Gip - United States

Today, my mother bitched me out for not finishing my laundry. I'm a 37-year-old mother of three. She rents my basement suite. FML

Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML

#20096305
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19274) - you deserved it (1657)

On 10/01/2012 at 1:47am - misc - by Prae - United States (Texas)

Today, my brother saw my side when my shirt came up, and asked when I got a tattoo; the pink he saw was in fact my stretch marks. Worst of all, I had to show them to everyone to prove I didn't actually get a tattoo. FML

#20096505
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20332) - you deserved it (2373)

On 10/01/2012 at 7:35am - health - by screw life (woman) - United States

Today, while studying liver pathology and highlighting important lines in my textbook, I realized that I could count the number of words I hadn't highlighted on one hand, over the last six pages. FML

#20143160
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14719) - you deserved it (7686)

On 11/01/2012 at 5:18pm - misc - by ThisisMedSchool - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a customer smiled, looked me in the eye and described to me in graphic detail the swelling that occurred to his nuts after his vasectomy. FML

#20142730
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15879) - you deserved it (1303)

On 11/01/2012 at 9:52am - work - by tmi. - Australia

Today, I came home to find a pregnancy test in my trashcan. I live alone with my boyfriend and I'm not pregnant. FML

#20430574
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37668) - you deserved it (2287)

On 12/29/2012 at 7:22pm - love - by melas303 - United States

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

#20438672
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37248) - you deserved it (8803)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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