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Today, I had to wrap presents for a cat. FML

#6910234
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24564) - you deserved it (7254)

On 12/23/2009 at 9:12pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I forgot to take a certain medication that helps turn my lead logs into flaky floaters. So what happens? I'm in the restroom for 30 minutes, straining to go, and two girls walk in and start imitating me. FML

Today, a girl who has had a problem with me for as long as I can remember, tagged me in a Facebook status update in which she equated my intelligence to that of a mollusk and equated my weight to that of a hippopotamus. My boyfriend, as well as several of my "friends," liked it. FML

#13789800
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30891) - you deserved it (4310)

On 11/10/2010 at 12:33pm - misc - by smarter than a mollusk, skinner than a hippo - United States

Today, I'm in a relationship with a guy who yells at me everyday for things I didn't do, is in a dead-end job and is not attractive whatsoever, but I can't bring myself to break up with him because he would get to keep the dog. FML

#14195303
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15427) - you deserved it (51059)

On 12/13/2010 at 9:01pm - love - by blahblah (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that no one actually likes me as a friend. They only like me to get answers for school work. How did I find out? They were talking about it in front of me. Apparently I'm also invisible to them. FML

#13274150
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35335) - you deserved it (3601)

On 10/01/2010 at 7:31am - misc - by DepressedKid - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered that the wintergreen breath mints I've been taking for a week now, are actually circular, flavored, white and green laxatives. FML

#9111190
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9442) - you deserved it (26793)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was feeling very ill after a severe anxiety attack. I asked my boyfriend to hold my hand until I fell asleep. He said he couldn't because he needed both hands to play on his gameboy. FML

#10705425
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38093) - you deserved it (7252)

On 05/23/2010 at 1:47am - love - by vikingunicorn (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I found out that it's extremely difficult to take a dump while holding a cup under your ass for a lab specimen. I also found out that you get so nervous that you can actually forget to lock the door. FML

#14635663
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28078) - you deserved it (5410)

On 01/19/2011 at 3:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Lebanon

Today, I was on my way to work behind a very slow car. At a red light, the lady came over and punched me in the face for following her too closely. We are coworkers and our desks are next to each other. FML

#14552210
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29762) - you deserved it (4064)

On 01/12/2011 at 8:28am - misc - by will3000 -

Today, I got a new roommate in the dorms. When I got back to my room, I could smell her feet before I even opened my door. FML

#14955673
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35057) - you deserved it (2710)

On 02/13/2011 at 6:38am - health - by floggingnasty - United States (North Carolina)

Today, someone wearing dark grey clothes thought it would be a good idea to run in front of my car in the pouring rain. I slammed on my brakes and managed to stop before I'd have turned him into a blood sprinkler. Unfortunately, the person behind me didn't. FML

Today, I was walking on the beach when I tripped. I was about to land on a kid's sandcastle, so I tried to dodge by leaning left to avoid it. Before I hit the ground, I noticed the many rocks I was heading for. FML

#17197831
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30815) - you deserved it (4177)

On 07/21/2011 at 12:18am - misc - by MICHAELTHEA (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, mom was so upset when she found out that she is having another granddaughter that she wants us to pay her back for the little boy clothes that she bought before the sex of the baby was known. FML

#17372798
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30215) - you deserved it (2381)

On 08/04/2011 at 11:56pm - kids - by mommytobe (woman) - United States (California)



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