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Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML

#6839126
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6705) - you deserved it (32711)

On 12/20/2009 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I thought my family would like it if I celebrated the new year with them. My brother thought that I'd like him to shoot my butt with his new gun in celebration. FML

#7077450
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21569) - you deserved it (2347)

On 01/01/2010 at 5:29am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got sent home from work for appearing stoned/under the influence of drugs. I suffer from severe hay fever, which no antihistamine has fixed yet, hence the red and glassy eyes. FML

#7121915
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25461) - you deserved it (1878)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:59am - health - by nzkristy (woman) - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML

#10678608
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27446) - you deserved it (5088)

On 05/21/2010 at 10:33pm - misc - by Jlipka - United States

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months told me he was not going to celebrate Valentine's day because it was a "capitalistic consumerism holiday". He works in a bank and helps "capitalism consumerism" 364 days a year. FML

#8043963
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21216) - you deserved it (4680)

On 02/09/2010 at 4:49am - misc - by Brokenheartz - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I was chatting with a cute guy on Omegle. He seemed really friendly and interested after I had showed him a picture of me. When I mentioned that I play music, he seemed even more interested, so I gave him the link to my music Myspace. I waited patiently. He disconnected. FML

#8602827
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8878) - you deserved it (21686)

On 02/23/2010 at 10:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had a volleyball game against our rivals. I hit myself in the face with the ball 3 times, fell flat on my face against the court, and later had an asthma attack with no inhaler in sight. We lost the game. FML

#12879741
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23568) - you deserved it (5997)

On 09/03/2010 at 1:05am - misc - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was finally hooking up with a girl I was after for a long time.Things got really hot and heavy but she stopped and looked at me weird. She said, "I can't do it, you're really wet. It looks like chicken fat." FML

#8658617
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18272) - you deserved it (3487)

On 02/26/2010 at 5:21am - intimacy - by humiliated - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had my first ice skating lesson. I had to wait 5 years for a rink to open in my town, 2 weeks for my lessons to begin, but only 10 minutes to fall and hit my tailbone so hard that I can't walk. FML

#8300373
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21663) - you deserved it (3697)

On 02/15/2010 at 1:40pm - health - by skatergrrrl (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, after a particularly gruesome nightmare about spiders due to my irrational phobia, I decided to try and desensitise myself by googling 'house spiders'. I can't stop the feeling of something crawling over every inch of my body, but at least I now know they can live up to six years. FML

#8700237
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17786) - you deserved it (6385)

On 02/27/2010 at 9:03pm - health - by joolsie (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my mum was saying she needs to gain weight because she was underweight according to her doctor. She then said she's going to eat like me in order to gain more weight. FML

#8047035
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22248) - you deserved it (6581)

On 02/09/2010 at 9:26am - health - by mynameislor - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I applied for my job, while working at my job. I hope they hire me. FML

#9171908
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21398) - you deserved it (5390)

On 03/17/2010 at 10:12pm - work - by TheSuregeon (man) - United States (Kentucky)



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