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Today, at work, my boss said something that I didn't catch. I went to take a leash off a dog, (I'm a groomer's assistant) and looked at my boss and said "What?" To which she replied, "Be careful, he bites." I now have a two-inch gash on my finger from a 6lb fluffy Maltese. FML

#6377475
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17395) - you deserved it (4955)

On 11/20/2009 at 3:29am - work - by DamnDogs (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my roommate of seven weeks decided to kick me out. He blames me for the stains on his expensive white leather couch, even after a prof cleaner determined it was red wine. I don't drink red wine. He does. FML

#6441828
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27185) - you deserved it (1740)

On 11/25/2009 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I went skating at the local rink. I had a really hard time balancing and was falling all over the place. After everyone had a good laugh, someone finally decided to tell me that one of my blade covers was still on, thanks. FML

#6655423
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9151) - you deserved it (25953)

On 12/07/2009 at 9:32pm - misc - by skating101 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got stuck in the snow in the middle of street. As I was just beginning to get myself unstuck, the snow plow came by and buried the front end of my car. FML

#6671880
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23904) - you deserved it (1820)

On 12/08/2009 at 10:03pm - misc - by HoHoSnow (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my friend found a picture of herself on a website filled with pictures of thin people. I was in the picture, also. I was crossed-out with the word, "EWW" written next to me. FML

#6532310
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29378) - you deserved it (3858)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my very good friend ratted me out to my boss because I used the photocopier for personal use. He said he will always be my friend, but "rules are rules." FML

#6569085
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31025) - you deserved it (8327)

On 12/02/2009 at 3:20pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

#6991981
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18414) - you deserved it (5349)

On 12/28/2009 at 11:58am - intimacy - by disapointed girl - United States (New York)

Today, I thought my family would like it if I celebrated the new year with them. My brother thought that I'd like him to shoot my butt with his new gun in celebration. FML

#7077450
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21729) - you deserved it (2360)

On 01/01/2010 at 5:29am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got sent home from work for appearing stoned/under the influence of drugs. I suffer from severe hay fever, which no antihistamine has fixed yet, hence the red and glassy eyes. FML

#7121915
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27487) - you deserved it (2033)

On 01/03/2010 at 5:59am - health - by nzkristy (woman) - New Zealand (Southland)

Today, formal portraits of my entire class were posted online, with about five photos per person. As my mom was looking at them, she was commenting about how pretty all my classmates look. When she got to my photos, all she had to say was "ugh". FML

#7222160
28 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22852) - you deserved it (2318)

On 01/08/2010 at 7:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to not go to a strip club for the second Saturday in a row, because I didn't want to appear desperate in front of the strippers. FML

#8502546
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7283) - you deserved it (18669)

On 02/21/2010 at 1:08am - intimacy - by hayah - Sent from mobile version

Today, I had to buy a wrist splint for my carpal tunnel syndrome. Not because I'm a computer programmer or some hot shot web designer but because I spend ALL of my time playing Solitaire on my laptop. FML

#7984912
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5924) - you deserved it (28517)

On 02/07/2010 at 8:56pm - misc - by 16seconds - United States

Today, I was chatting with a cute guy on Omegle. He seemed really friendly and interested after I had showed him a picture of me. When I mentioned that I play music, he seemed even more interested, so I gave him the link to my music Myspace. I waited patiently. He disconnected. FML

#8602827
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8946) - you deserved it (21843)

On 02/23/2010 at 10:41pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Louisiana)



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