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Today, the guy I like and his friend came home with me to work on a project. I opened my front door and my mum was at the top of the stairs completely naked, bent over, drying her hair with the hairdryer. It took a few moments for her to realise we were there. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25625) - you deserved it (1688)
On 02/13/2013 at 6:47am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (North Ayrshire)
Today, I was taking a stroll in our yard, when my mother decided it would be hilarious to run me down with her Segway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18209) - you deserved it (2168)
On 02/08/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, I was at an estate sale of my neighbor who recently passed. I recognized many items for sale that I had ordered or won on eBay from the past 8 years. Turns out the little old lady had been stealing my mail for close to a decade. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32103) - you deserved it (2504)
Today, for the second time this week, I was asked to stop putting on such an obviously fake "British" accent. I am British and have lived here all my life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27323) - you deserved it (1857)
On 02/19/2013 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, after an argument with my pianist girlfriend about how bad my favourite song would sound on the piano, she stormed out of the room crying, leaving behind a CD. It was the piano version of the song she'd made for me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9476) - you deserved it (54875)
On 03/02/2013 at 10:38pm - love - by douchegamer - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27954) - you deserved it (2697)
On 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm - misc - by DumbCuntApparently (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)
Today, my boyfriend of 2 years decided to tell an unimaginably rude joke to my grandma while at my house. She hit him over the head with a vase, and he's threatening to press charges. I still don't know whose side to take. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25981) - you deserved it (2905)
On 02/23/2013 at 11:13am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I went to a paintball match with a group of friends, one of whom brought his dad along. His dad is a weight-lifting, wannabe alpha male fucknut who thinks that chokeslamming opponents is a legitimate close-quarters paintball tactic. My broken shoulder disagrees. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33585) - you deserved it (2598)
On 03/02/2013 at 1:59pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom
Today, the guy in the dorm room next to me was playing very loud metal music. I went next door and kindly asked him to turn it off. He did, so I went back to my room to go back to sleep. It turns out he was using the music to drown out his girlfriend's very loud moans. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1214) - you deserved it (9098)
On 03/09/2013 at 8:35am - intimacy - by ShittyWalls (man) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I had to give a 15-minute presentation for a conference. I hadn't had the time to write out a proper speech so I decided to just wing it. My sponsor liked my presentation so much he wants me to turn it into an article. Now if only I could remember what I said. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29226) - you deserved it (8322)
On 04/04/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by BrillianceSucks (woman) - Canada
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head during the horror flick we were watching. Little did I know, my girlfriend isn't a big fan of horror films. It was during a sex scene that intensified the moment. The same sex scene from which emerged a sudden jump-scare. I now have bite marks on my penis. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20151) - you deserved it (36328)
On 03/17/2013 at 5:07am - intimacy - by Cliché... or Touché? -
Today, I nervously started a new job, and my co-workers were telling me silly rules about our boss. Later, I accidentally bumped into him, and blurted "Rule #7, don't touch George." He definitely heard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13047) - you deserved it (27266)
On 03/29/2013 at 12:38am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, an attractive guy came up to me and told me that I looked sexy in a picture online. He then asked himself why he had never asked me out before. Apparently, he doesn't remember our 6-month relationship, or how it ended when he slept with my sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36426) - you deserved it (1963)
On 03/18/2013 at 4:28am - love - by mcds2 (woman) - United States
Monday 17 June 2013
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