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Today, at work, we've just hired a new load of people. As an icebreaker, we were paired up randomly and told to learn about our partner so that we can introduce them to the group. I got matched up with someone I've worked with for 4 months. Mid-conversation, I blurted out "I don't know your name." FML

#15877109
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8198) - you deserved it (25258)

On 04/21/2011 at 7:49pm - work - by Clueless (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I noticed my 5-gallon glass vase/aquarium was leaking at the base. When I went to move the vase so I could transfer everything to a new aquarium, the bottom completely detached, sending water, sand, sea shells and fish crap everywhere. FML

#18499950
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18193) - you deserved it (4298)

On 12/13/2011 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML

#20067208
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13610) - you deserved it (1704)

On 09/11/2012 at 2:47am - misc - by NotDrunk (man) - United States (California)

Today, a woman somehow managed to drop her wedding ring into the garbage at the fast food place where I work. I had to search through a full bag of half eaten food and soda to find it. FML

#17909071
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25021) - you deserved it (2238)

On 10/05/2011 at 1:28am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to take two buses home from a friend's house. After waiting in the cold for the second bus for 40 minutes, it finally came and I realized that I'd left my wallet on the first bus. It took me 2 hours to walk home and I was locked out because my house key is attached to my wallet. FML

#18541076
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24716) - you deserved it (6053)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:25am - misc - by Kayla (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I woke up to an email confirming my membership to a dating site. Turns out my mother is as annoyed by my loveless life as I am. FML

#19708728
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17839) - you deserved it (1945)

On 05/31/2012 at 7:29am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, I had to share a car with my dad and stepmother. My stepmother managed to get hammered at lunch and spent the hour-long car trip drunkenly mistaking the heating controls for the radio. FML

#18599124
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16632) - you deserved it (1730)

On 12/24/2011 at 3:04pm - misc - by ambled - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, because I was the only manager scheduled, I went into work despite feeling sick to my stomach. While sitting down with a customer, I got the urge to throw up and tried to hold it back. Instead I vomited in my mouth, instinctively swallowed and started choking in front of the customer. FML

#19385942
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20104) - you deserved it (2497)

On 04/01/2012 at 12:32am - work - by Kristat (woman) - United States

Today, it was my first day as a vacuum salesman. While I was demonstrating how well it removed stains, I managed to smear stuff over the area I was cleaning. So not only was I unsuccessful in removing the original stains, I left them with worse carpet than when I got there. FML

#18451587
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8173) - you deserved it (21446)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:29am - work - by JB - United States

Today, I tried to impress my wife by doing a bunch of push-ups, despite having a bad shoulder. She told me my form sucks and that I'm an idiot. Now I can barely move my arm and I'm going to have to get it fixed. FML

#19122555
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8054) - you deserved it (27874)

On 02/20/2012 at 12:36pm - love - by WTA (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was transporting liquor between stores for work. A car pulled out and cut me off, causing me to slam on my brakes. My car stopped. The 200 dollars-worth of booze did not. FML

#18859567
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21475) - you deserved it (2853)

On 01/20/2012 at 3:23am - work - by LiquorChick (woman) - United States

Today, I got my first job after having spent months looking, and graduating college in the meantime. I got it based on my pre-college qualifications. FML

#17928549
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17657) - you deserved it (2085)

On 10/07/2011 at 3:32pm - work - by jdmarine83 - United States

Today, I had to cut short my New Year's resolution of going to the gym daily, when the meathead next to me dropped some heavy weights, which bounced and landed on my foot. I'm sitting at home in a cast. FML

#18705710
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23761) - you deserved it (1934)

On 01/04/2012 at 11:55am - health - by gimpy (man) - United States (California)



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