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Today, my friend and I went to a tacky-themed party. She was wearing orange faux snake stilettos. I commented, "Those are perfect for tonight, where'd you manage to find such hideous shoes?" It turns out she wears those shoes all the time, the color just matched her outfit. FML

#181542
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11565) - you deserved it (41423)

On 03/02/2009 at 9:07am - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I did my work, the work of my co-worker who called in sick and the work of my boss who has no idea what the hell is going on all at the same time. I didn't get a promotion because I don't work hard enough. FML

#101471
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40883) - you deserved it (2854)

On 02/22/2009 at 1:14am - work - by Noname (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I checked my email for the hundredth time, hoping to hear back from a potential employer about a job I really want. No response. Why? My email with resume attached has been sitting in my Outbox for the past week. I never actually sent it out in the first place. FML

#5612700
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7743) - you deserved it (34283)

On 10/02/2009 at 10:23pm - work - by Unemployed (woman) - United States

Today, I was searching for a travel bag. I looked in my parents room for one. I found one alright, with all there sex toys in it. FML

#5464453
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19286) - you deserved it (5720)

On 09/25/2009 at 10:37am - intimacy - by R-R-R-Ray (man) - Australia (Australian Capital Territory)

Today, my wife told me she had stopped taking her anti-depressants a month ago in hopes of increasing her non-existent sex drive. I asked her if it had helped, and was about to suggest she start taking them again for her own wellbeing. She replied with, "Anyway, I'm just not attracted to you." FML

#6191622
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18147) - you deserved it (2054)

On 11/07/2009 at 2:06am - intimacy - by iMarriedmymother (man) - United States (California)

Today, I canceled my dental check-up because I'm getting busy at work. Then, as I was flossing, my finger slipped, I heard a "crunch" from one of my fillings, and I now have a killer toothache. It's costing me double to go to the dentist because it's now an emergency call. FML

#6340550
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23599) - you deserved it (6702)

On 11/17/2009 at 11:56am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, at work, my boss said something that I didn't catch. I went to take a leash off a dog, (I'm a groomer's assistant) and looked at my boss and said "What?" To which she replied, "Be careful, he bites." I now have a two-inch gash on my finger from a 6lb fluffy Maltese. FML

#6377475
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17328) - you deserved it (4944)

On 11/20/2009 at 3:29am - work - by DamnDogs (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my roommate of seven weeks decided to kick me out. He blames me for the stains on his expensive white leather couch, even after a prof cleaner determined it was red wine. I don't drink red wine. He does. FML

#6441828
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27092) - you deserved it (1736)

On 11/25/2009 at 2:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Delaware)

Today, I went skating at the local rink. I had a really hard time balancing and was falling all over the place. After everyone had a good laugh, someone finally decided to tell me that one of my blade covers was still on, thanks. FML

#6655423
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9120) - you deserved it (25877)

On 12/07/2009 at 9:32pm - misc - by skating101 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got stuck in the snow in the middle of street. As I was just beginning to get myself unstuck, the snow plow came by and buried the front end of my car. FML

#6671880
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23808) - you deserved it (1817)

On 12/08/2009 at 10:03pm - misc - by HoHoSnow (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my friend found a picture of herself on a website filled with pictures of thin people. I was in the picture, also. I was crossed-out with the word, "EWW" written next to me. FML

#6532310
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29300) - you deserved it (3854)

On 11/30/2009 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my lawyer threatened to sue me because I can't afford his bill, which he sent to me after getting me out of a lawsuit. FML

#6569414
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10962) - you deserved it (32741)

On 12/02/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend of a month and I had sex for the first time. We started in the shower and then moved to his bedroom. He then feel asleep when I was on top. FML

#6991981
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16616) - you deserved it (5077)

On 12/28/2009 at 11:58am - intimacy - by disapointed girl - United States (New York)



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