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Today, I was uninvited to a bachelorette party. I wouldn't really care, if the party hadn't been for me, ahead of my wedding tomorrow. FML

#20885218
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48116) - you deserved it (3810)

On 09/17/2013 at 1:52pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my husband and I were talking about celebrities he finds attractive. All of these beautiful, talented, glamorous women were starting to make me feel very plain, so he attempted to console me by saying, "But I love you. You're attainable!" FML

#20926020
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44710) - you deserved it (6257)

On 10/19/2013 at 3:30am - love - by AchievementUnlocked? - United States

Today, like every day since my wife was prescribed antibiotics for an infection, I had to hide one of the pills inside her food, because she'd apparently rather fall seriously ill than swallow them like an adult. FML

#21022498
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45117) - you deserved it (4407)

On 01/09/2014 at 2:02pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I got into a slight spot of shit with my new boss over his speech. Apparently he was not actually impersonating Sylvester the Cat, and he just has a speech impediment. When I jokingly said "sufferin' succotash" to him, he wasn't pleased at all. FML

#21056453
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21813) - you deserved it (41064)

On 02/10/2014 at 5:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up after a night of New Year's Eve partying. I remember the night going great. What I don't remember is laying naked in the shower while my girlfriend ran water over my body to make me feel better. I also made my own funeral plans because I was convinced I was going to die. FML

#21328812
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27148) - you deserved it (7461)

On 01/01/2015 at 6:02pm - misc - by CK95 - United States

Today, our new boss banned coffee from the workplace, comparing caffeine to hard drugs. His comparison may not be wrong; after two hours, I couldn't take it any more, and in between fantasising about his cold-blooded murder, I begged to be allowed just one last cup. FML

#21403720
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30774) - you deserved it (4805)

On 05/03/2015 at 1:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - Finland

Today, I wore a sleeveless shirt for the first time in years, when I glimpsed something on my shoulder that looked like a spider. I let out a scream that sounded like a donkey having a stroke and flailed my arms. Then I realized it was my tattoo, and that I was freaking out everyone on the bus. FML

#21427542
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24784) - you deserved it (12296)

On 06/17/2015 at 11:41am - misc - by HURP (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I went out to eat with my aunt and uncle, I barely looked at the male waiter because I'm a shy person. Then my uncle says: "YOU SHOULD TAKE OUT MY NIECE! She's never dated in her life." I'm 19 and my match maker is my uncle. FML

#3846
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29810) - you deserved it (3044)

On 01/30/2009 at 5:08pm - love - by Noname - United States (California)

Today, my fiance told me that he no longer loves me, that he still has feelings for an ex. The wedding is off and he needs the ring back to give to the right woman. FML

#6280
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75537) - you deserved it (3717)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:08pm - love - by nolongerengaged (woman) - United States

Today, I went to get my underarms waxed. I'm usually not self-conscious because I figure they see worse stuff all the time. When I raised my arm for her to wax my armpit she looked at me, laughed and said "Well I guess that's how I know it's winter in Wisconsin!" FML

#186916
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41142) - you deserved it (9149)

On 03/02/2009 at 6:38pm - misc - by Kelly (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML

#3036778
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42704) - you deserved it (5200)

On 06/19/2009 at 5:41pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to go swimming. I knew my technique would be off because I haven't swam since high school. It was when I made it only halfway across the pool that the lifeguard decided to jump in and save me. I wasn't drowning or struggling. FML

#2780128
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43944) - you deserved it (4472)

On 06/10/2009 at 6:50pm - health - by anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was pulling out of my driveway, and was being aware of the flowers I had just planted. I moved my head to look out my window as not to hit them, not realizing my window was up. I then hit my head break my nose and drive over the flowers. FML

#1845735
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22636) - you deserved it (41881)

On 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm - misc - by samantha246 - United States (New York)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

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Friday 5 February 2016

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