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Today, I got my first job after having spent months looking, and graduating college in the meantime. I got it based on my pre-college qualifications. FML

#17928549
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23138) - you deserved it (2958)

On 10/07/2011 at 3:32pm - work - by jdmarine83 - United States

Today, I discovered that I have to share a room with my new stepbrother. I also discovered that he takes the same number of showers over the course of two weeks as I do in a single day: one. FML

#18640460
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26117) - you deserved it (1923)

On 12/29/2011 at 12:53am - health - by garfield749 (man) - United States

Today, I was walking down the street when I had a coughing fit. The next thing I know I'm being pushed about by a group of guys who were smoking, because they thought I was coughing deliberately to send them a message about smoking being bad. FML

#20055365
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21023) - you deserved it (1519)

On 09/03/2012 at 5:37am - misc - by Tyler - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I got stuck for a while in a hallway between two security doors due to a malfunction. I'm not claustrophobic, but I sure am sensitive to horrifying smells coming from a nearby bathroom stall. FML

#18906586
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19658) - you deserved it (1829)

On 01/25/2012 at 10:50am - work - by replik - Russian Federation

Today, I worked 4 hours for a huge mail call to get all the troops their Christmas mail. And just like every other mail call I did not receive one package or letter. FML

#18595916
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25765) - you deserved it (2168)

On 12/24/2011 at 3:38am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up with the worst vaginal itching and swelling. I then find out it was brought on by my boyfriend's cheap brand of toilet paper. FML

#19173596
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23005) - you deserved it (3281)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got denied a job. They told me I was unreliable because I didn't show up for my third interview. This is the same interview they called and cancelled this morning. FML

#19025988
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24765) - you deserved it (1667)

On 02/08/2012 at 11:53am - work - by abrooks88 - United States

Today, the only person to wish me a happy birthday was a survey website. I took their stupid survey out of appreciation. FML

#19391757
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20781) - you deserved it (2011)

On 04/01/2012 at 10:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, a lady told me her husband had sinus surgery. I replied, "Oh, I know someone who just had that done." I then realized I meant Alexis on The Real Housewives of the OC. FML

#19404446
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6656) - you deserved it (24515)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:53pm - misc - by gaagaa - United States

Today, I was warning a girl in my art class to be careful with a Stanley knife, as she had managed to cut her finger quite badly. Just as I said it, I sliced my finger open with a Stanley knife. FML

#19311735
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17597) - you deserved it (9556)

On 03/20/2012 at 12:33am - health - by insightful - Australia

Today, I found a tiny, featherless baby bird. I knew it was impossible, but I tried to keep it alive through the day. Before I could get it to the wildlife center, it died, and when I got all choked up over it, my mom started laughing at me and saying how "weak" I was. FML

#20077707
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24847) - you deserved it (4249)

On 09/18/2012 at 12:19pm - animals - by Birdwatcher (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I started my new job as a repossession agent. While attempting to repo a boat, we came across a young couple. The woman was very annoying, and even hit another agent, so I threatened to throw her in the water if she touched him again. I ended up in the water instead. FML

#19776443
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18025) - you deserved it (12972)

On 06/12/2012 at 12:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I slipped in a pile of vomit someone left for me on the train platform on the way to work, spraying puke all over both of my legs. It's only 6:30am. It's going to be a long day. FML



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  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

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