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Today, I decided to turn my life around and start exercising more. I didn't even make it out the door before I tripped and fractured my ankle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30930) - you deserved it (3055)
On 03/19/2013 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, I was outside at a café and looked at my phone. When I did, a woman halfway across the patio started screaming at me, demanding I tell her who I was texting and why. She then sprinted over, furious at me for apparently badmouthing her to somebody. All I did was check the time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31863) - you deserved it (2240)
On 03/17/2013 at 7:00am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I got dumped during sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (55230) - you deserved it (5628)
On 03/28/2013 at 6:02am - intimacy - by Bigfatfailure (man) - United States (California)
Today, my school announced its senior motto for the year. For the second year in a row, it's "YOLO". FML
I agree, your life sucks (41955) - you deserved it (4784)
On 04/12/2013 at 1:21pm - misc - by it's a wonder I'm not illiterate as fuck - United States (New Jersey)
Today, while practicing a song in choir, I got a boner. Trying to cover it up, I tried sitting down. My choir teacher got mad and made me stand in front of the whole class. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58334) - you deserved it (6866)
On 04/23/2013 at 12:08pm - intimacy - by Soundofaboner - United States
Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38768) - you deserved it (4113)
On 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)
Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (58281) - you deserved it (5856)
On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, while packing for a trip, my mom bumped my bag and it started to vibrate. She flew into a huge rage calling me all sorts of colourful names, thinking it was a sex toy. It was my tooth brush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (57658) - you deserved it (3758)
On 05/08/2013 at 10:44am - intimacy - by oops - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend bought me a silver necklace. I have a silver allergy, but I thanked him anyway and encouraged him to return it. I found out later that he knew about my allergy all along and bought it on purpose so he could return it, get a refund, and still look good. FML
I agree, your life sucks (51817) - you deserved it (3840)
On 05/09/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)
Today, whilst driving past a cyclist, I thought it would be funny to make him jump by blasting my horn right behind him and then driving off. I guess he thought it would be funny to catch up with me, yank off my wing-mirror, and hurl it through the open window at my face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10453) - you deserved it (90430)
On 05/23/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by faitoh - United Kingdom (Lisburn)
Today, my cockgoblin of an ex showed up at my house, begging me to take him back. This guy, with his friends' help, faked being kidnapped just so he could use the "trauma" to guilt me into sleeping with him after he "escaped". When he finally left, he yelled that I'm a selfish bitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34720) - you deserved it (6960)
On 05/19/2013 at 2:02pm - love - by SariLone (woman) - India (Maharashtra)
Today, while at the movies, I had an uncomfortable amount of gas that I couldn't hold in any longer. I waited for a loud part in the movie to conceal it and took my chance. Problem was, the loud part ended abruptly. I didn't. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40127) - you deserved it (13780)
On 05/25/2013 at 4:19am - misc - by Cristoforo - United States (New York)
Today, I walked into the living room, only to find my brother wanking off to an episode of My Little Pony. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43717) - you deserved it (4143)
On 06/14/2013 at 6:29pm - intimacy - by bestiality, not even once (woman) - Ireland (Waterford)
Monday 17 June 2013
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