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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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Today, my boyfriend informed me that the mother of his children, from whom he is not divorced yet, is moving back into his house because she broke up with her boyfriend and has nowhere to go. FML

#18459025
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27979) - you deserved it (7960)

On 12/08/2011 at 6:55am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, the couple with three noisy toddlers in the apartment above mine finally moved out. A couple with a non-stop crying newborn moved in. FML

#19097249
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24054) - you deserved it (2652)

On 02/16/2012 at 6:30pm - kids - by Username - United States (Texas)

Today, I ran for editor-in-chief of a magazine. I spent hours working on my speech, and offered a bunch of new ideas to increase readership. My opponent just said that she, "loved the organization". I lost by a 4-1 margin. My opponent later announced her plans for next year. They were all of my ideas. FML

#19602303
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29987) - you deserved it (2153)

On 05/10/2012 at 11:45am - misc - by PollingLow (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, as I pulled to a halt at a stop sign, a cyclist ripped through the air, slammed straight into my fender, and almost launched over my car. I ended up being cited for reckless driving. FML

#19597798
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23280) - you deserved it (2155)

On 05/09/2012 at 2:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, our kids left for the weekend so that my wife and I could have some much-needed alone time. We've been fighting a lot recently and really need some time to have fun together. Now it turns out that she doesn't want to be around me because of the fighting. FML

#20123973
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20703) - you deserved it (5441)

On 10/19/2012 at 2:27pm - love - by marriedtoacunt (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my tire blew while I was on the freeway. I had to change the tire in pouring rain while wearing short shorts and flip-flops. No one stopped to help, but several people politely honked as if to remind me of my misfortune. FML

#20062636
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21580) - you deserved it (3353)

On 09/08/2012 at 12:47am - misc - by wonder woman (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after getting a new haircut, I decided to take a few photos. I set up my iPhone in my room and began posing. It wasn't until numerous shots later that I realized my phone had posted every picture to Facebook, and they were all over everyone's newsfeed. FML

#20561054
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17422) - you deserved it (43432)

On 03/26/2013 at 2:31pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I found out I was an alcoholic. Not from my friends or family, but because the ice-maker couldn't keep up with the amount of drinks I've been making. FML

#20614650
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33556) - you deserved it (18798)

On 04/22/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by KyngJulian - United States

Today, I called my fiancé just to tell him how much I love him, as a sweet gesture. He yelled at me for interrupting his video game and blamed my "neediness" on the fact that I'm menstruating. FML

#20684824
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44552) - you deserved it (7947)

On 05/25/2013 at 12:40am - love - by BellinaNico (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was torn from my car and slammed against the hood because a canister of window-cleaning wipes I keep in my glove compartment apparently looks vaguely like a pipe-bomb. My lawyer agreed with the cops, and won't handle the "excessive force" case I threatened the police with. FML

#20683298
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43307) - you deserved it (4114)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:42am - misc - by JDziewaltowski (man) - United States

Today, my sister-in-law pooped with the bathroom door open until my husband had to tell her to close it, then she came out with unwashed hands and started rooting through the cookies. This isn't even the most unhygienic thing she's done today. FML

#20871127
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52065) - you deserved it (3383)

On 09/07/2013 at 7:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 17-year-old son hacked off the legs of his bed with a saw. His explanation? "The bed looks cooler closer to the floor." FML

#20870098
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39158) - you deserved it (4646) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/06/2013 at 7:56am - kids - by Anonyme - France (Basse-Normandie)

Today, I came home to find my parents wearing Santa hats and blasting Christmas music at full volume. So begins three months of hell. FML

#20898104
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39086) - you deserved it (4040)

On 09/27/2013 at 3:08pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Hordaland)



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