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Today, I was massively hungover and driving home. I had a strong suspicion that I was gonna ralph so I was smart and pulled over. I emptied the contents of my stomach into a shopping bag and was proud I didn't make a mess all over the car. Seconds later, the bottom of the bag gave out. FML

#8876502
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8958) - you deserved it (23046)

On 03/06/2010 at 8:17pm - misc - by Octobre (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML

#8409963
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18782) - you deserved it (3501)

On 02/18/2010 at 3:08pm - love - by gp28 - United States

Today, I got a separation agreement from my wife. It was sent from the lawyer she spent the long weekend with right before she told me it was over. FML

#12951031
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24534) - you deserved it (2095)

On 09/07/2010 at 5:30pm - love - by Glutton for Punishment. - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was at a comedy club, and the girl behind me was drinking. Before she swallowed it, the comedian said something funny, making her spit it all in my hair. I had just had it done for my sister's wedding tomorrow. FML

#13190418
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26841) - you deserved it (5755)

On 09/25/2010 at 12:49am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I discovered my mom had sold all of our summer clothes over the winter on eBay because we're short on cash. However, I am allowed to cut off the sleeves of all my long sleeve shirts and the legs off my jeans to stay cool in the summer. Nothing's more attractive than looking trashy, right? FML

#9047777
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26153) - you deserved it (2631)

On 03/13/2010 at 2:16pm - money - by Nicole (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized that that tingly feeling on my face when I put a new combination of acne wash, acne medication, and my usual moisturizer on was not, in fact, "it working." It was slowly peeling away the top layer of skin. I look and feel sunburned. I also still have acne and oily skin. FML

#12549238
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24113) - you deserved it (5566)

On 08/15/2010 at 11:12pm - health - by Tingly (woman) - United States

Today, I went to the tanning bed. I laid down in the bed and turned it on and the fan started blowing. There was a terrible smell and I thought it was the person before me. Then I realized it was just the fan blowing my sweaty feet towards my face. FML

#9016591
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5002) - you deserved it (27185)

On 03/12/2010 at 2:35am - misc - by LXA429 - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got to my weekly drama group a bit late. Everyone looked surprised when I walked in. Casually, I sat down and apologised for being late. I thought everyone looked awkward, probably because it turned out I'd been kicked out of the group. The teacher had decided to announce it before making sure I'd got the email. FML

#13045584
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21403) - you deserved it (2909)

On 09/14/2010 at 4:31am - misc - by a7xforever (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, hoping to avoid the rain because I had just gotten an expensive perm, I ducked under an awning. At that moment, the store manager shook the awning, and about 6 hours of rain dumped on my head. FML

#11853841
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31055) - you deserved it (7682)

On 07/13/2010 at 3:43pm - misc - by dammitrain (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I dropped my physics class because I thought I bombed the 50% second midterm test. I got my results an hour after dropping online. I finished with an 83. I can't get back into the course. FML

#8945692
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6355) - you deserved it (55999)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:42pm - love - by mizzleshizzle - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I finally jumped high enough to dunk on the ten foot rim. I caught my tooth on the net and nearly pulled my tooth out. FML

#8943287
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23198) - you deserved it (5613)

On 03/09/2010 at 10:32am - health - by supermanxs1 - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the airport with my mom, who requested a wheelchair for me, since I have a broken leg. I'm 24. Embarrassed, I insisted I push myself around, instead of an airline assistant doing it. A few seconds later, I crash into the same airline assistant, who then falls back into my lap. FML

#13060775
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8596) - you deserved it (24964)

On 09/15/2010 at 11:53am - health - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, after moving into my new house, I agreed to let my house mates have a house warming on the condition it be a small one, as I have exams all day that day and one that I can't fail on the very next morning. The facebook event guest list now has 100+ confirmed guests. FML

#12418259
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12837) - you deserved it (22041)

On 08/09/2010 at 8:33pm - misc - by mitsuko045 (woman) - Ireland (Mayo)



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