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Sunday 23 November 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I noticed my fish was still hungry after feeding him earlier. I figured "ehh a little bit more won't kill him". I was wrong. FML

#21303699
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19656) - you deserved it (5389)

On 11/22/2014 at 2:22am - animals - by liishax3 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to babysit both my neighbor's 3-year-old daughter and my very pregnant cat. I left the room briefly, only to come back to a traumatized 3-year-old crying in horror as my cat gave birth in front of her. FML

#21303819
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17289) - you deserved it (1986)

On 11/22/2014 at 10:34am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Maine)

Today, my boss flipped me off in traffic on my way to work. FML

#21303116
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24610) - you deserved it (2889)

On 11/21/2014 at 1:11am - work - by TJ AJ RJ / IV the V - United States (California)

Today, the girl I'd been dating online for 6 months told me she was a guy. I said it was alright, and that I was still in love. Then she confessed she really was a girl, and was just trying to make me dump her so she wouldn't be the "bad guy". FML

#21303306
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27257) - you deserved it (5068)

On 11/21/2014 at 1:18pm - love - by Recluse (man) -

Today, after realizing my flashcards had fallen out of my binder, I asked my teacher if I could quickly go to my locker to get them. She said no and told me to go sit down. As soon as class ended, I went to my locker and brought them to her. Her response? "Why didn't you ask me to get these during class?" FML

#21301020
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32371) - you deserved it (2226)

On 11/17/2014 at 10:10pm - work - by ohgosh... (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, a customer said the pants she was buying rang up more than advertised. I quietly told her plus-sizes were not on sale. The customer yelled in front of a whole line of people, "So I'm fat and can't read! Any other insults you'd like to throw at me?" and stormed out of the store. FML

#21301098
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30466) - you deserved it (3876)

On 11/17/2014 at 11:16pm - work - by HereToLaughAtU (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I spent 20 minutes arguing with the class dipshit, trying to convince her that wifi hot-spots are not in fact saunas powered by wifi. FML

#21302021
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26415) - you deserved it (3104)

On 11/19/2014 at 10:09am - misc - by Donutsarelife - United States

Today, I've tried to have a quiet jack off four times, only for my dad to knock on my bedroom door within seconds and say "STOP IT." every single time. Now I'm too paranoid to even function. FML

#21302766
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26174) - you deserved it (6183)

On 11/20/2014 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by fuck fof and die dad (man) - Germany (Schleswig-Holstein)

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML

#21303024
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26726) - you deserved it (12286)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by AOart1st (man) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that if life gives you lemons, your sister is going to squeeze them over your face while you take a nap on the couch. FML

#21303546
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19429) - you deserved it (1437)

On 11/21/2014 at 9:00pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, on our third date, my date tried to get me drunk and kept trying to touch me up. When I said he was moving too fast, he sighed and soon left. Just minutes later, he posted on Facebook saying "Just got friendzoned -_-". One of his friends commented: "I hate bitches, man." FML

#21303774
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17990) - you deserved it (1954)

On 11/22/2014 at 8:44am - love - by drop dead single (woman) - United States

Today, I was selling winter-themed cookies at my university. I cheerfully asked a girl if she would like to buy cookies to support peer tutoring. Her response? "I don't eat food." FML

#21303227
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25394) - you deserved it (2699)

On 11/21/2014 at 8:51am - misc - by UTRejected (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my friend asked me to order take out for him because he gets nervous on phones. I called a chinese restaurant, only to get nervous and hang up. FML

#21300935
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24346) - you deserved it (6345)

On 11/17/2014 at 8:04pm - misc - by phonebaby - United States (Connecticut)



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