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Friday 24 October 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I smashed a spider with my pencil eraser. Later, I absentmindedly chewed on it while doing my homework. FML

#21282480
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18624) - you deserved it (24434)

On 10/21/2014 at 3:46pm - misc - by GetMeTheDamnBleach (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I tried to download some network-monitoring software for the office as I suspect that one of my staff has been constantly downloading torrents. It wouldn't download because someone was using all the bandwidth. FML

#21282944
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24888) - you deserved it (2438)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:09am - work - by Thewatcher (man) - Mauritius

Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend for touching up, but unfortunately we had a major argument recently. I guess that's why in the photos I've been photoshopped out and replaced with a goat. FML

#21283103
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26457) - you deserved it (5248)

On 10/22/2014 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

#21283288
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28984) - you deserved it (2062)

On 10/22/2014 at 6:38pm - intimacy - by BadLuckLad (man) - United Kingdom (Portsmouth)

Today, I was passing notes in class with my crush. I started to pour my heart out and tell him about how I've liked him for years. I was caught by the teacher. He looked at it, laughed, and tore it up. He then looked at me and said, "I just saved you from years of embarrassment. You're welcome." FML

#21283544
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27787) - you deserved it (7282)

On 10/23/2014 at 12:04am - love - by Rachel - United States (Ohio)

Today, while doing physical therapy exercises for my broken leg, I managed to throw my back out. Now I can neither walk nor sit up. FML

#21281586
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27027) - you deserved it (2280)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:00am - health - by cray12 - United States

Today, I got drug tested for the second time this week. It's Tuesday. FML

Today, I fell asleep on the couch. My parents didn't wake me up, went to bed and set our burglar alarm. If I trip a motion sensor, a siren will go off. The motion sensor in my living room is pointed directly at me and I have to pee. It's been 2 hours. FML

#21282761
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27309) - you deserved it (3286)

On 10/21/2014 at 10:11pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my annoying colleague gasped, wrapped her arms around herself, started sweating and curled up in a ball crying, "No, no, no" in front of several customers. They accused me of 'setting her off', when I blurted out, "Sorry, she gets panic attacks". All I did was say the word 'abortion'. FML

#21281594
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28149) - you deserved it (5112)

On 10/20/2014 at 4:31am - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I discovered that if you heckle a mime, it's possible that the mime will actually kick your ass. FML

#21283193
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12053) - you deserved it (27149)

On 10/22/2014 at 4:24pm - misc - by mr_cheese (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, early in the morning, I got a knock on the door from the police. It seems my son and his friend had been caught throwing toilet paper at a neighbour's house. He's 23. FML

#21283412
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24874) - you deserved it (2664)

On 10/22/2014 at 9:33pm - kids - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I didn't make dinner fast enough so somebody had a yelling and screaming temper tantrum. It would be understandable if the person who threw the tantrum was a child, and not my 57-year-old father. FML

#21283737
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21553) - you deserved it (1795)

On 10/23/2014 at 11:56am - misc - by mnote (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my wife got a new best-friend. It's my ex-wife. FML

#21283962
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21132) - you deserved it (1932)

On 10/23/2014 at 7:30pm - love - by max - United States (Florida)



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Friday 24 October 2014

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