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Saturday 14 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She later put on Facebook that, "Today was a great day!" FML

#20878650
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46037) - you deserved it (4167)

On 09/12/2013 at 7:08pm - love - by WTF - United States (Illinois)

Today, I asked my girlfriend to marry me. She pretended like it never happened. FML

Today, I started my new job. Only after I met my new boss did I realise I've met him before. He was at my friend's party last month, the only time in my life when I got so wasted that I danced on a table before puking on myself. He remembers me, too. FML

#20886598
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41998) - you deserved it (11315)

On 09/18/2013 at 2:31pm - work - by Anoymous (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, I had to explain to my mother that faith healing will not work on plumbing. FML

Today, my girlfriend invited me over for the first time. I pulled up to her house just to be denied at the front door by her mum. She'd invited me over to break up with me, but had her mum do it for her. FML

#20876765
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54213) - you deserved it (3442)

On 09/11/2013 at 5:30am - love - by AnonymousLoser (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I pulled my motorcycle into a wheelie when my crush drove by. She was the one who drove me to the hospital when I went over backward. FML

#20878799
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19797) - you deserved it (49511)

On 09/12/2013 at 9:11pm - misc - by Robert - United States (Michigan)

Today, I noticed that my new colleague never laughs. Instead she says, "LOL". I have to work with her every day. FML

#20884887
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38424) - you deserved it (2594)

On 09/17/2013 at 4:26am - work - by Jienaf (man) - Malta

Today, I realized that it's become a regular occurrence for my mother and me to talk about our pubic hair. I don't know which is worse: the fact that I know she shaves it, or the fact that we even talk about this stuff. FML

#20875739
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36083) - you deserved it (13111)

On 09/10/2013 at 1:44pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while chatting with a friend online, I told her that Kristen Stewart isn't going to star in the 50 Shades movie as she originally thought. She then spammed me with so many "NO"/"NO WAY" messages that my crappy laptop froze up, forcing me to reboot and lose a ton of unsaved essay notes. FML

#20879898
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40186) - you deserved it (11072)

On 09/13/2013 at 5:31pm - misc - by CHEERS, TUMBLTARD (woman) -

Today, my mother informed me that we are no longer taking my graduation trip to New York. Instead, she and her group of continuously drunk friends are going to Vegas because, "We could win the jackpot and take you on an even bigger trip to New York!" She's never won anything in her whole life. FML

#20875663
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49817) - you deserved it (3234)

On 09/10/2013 at 11:52am - money - by zcollins - United States (California)

Today, I got fired from my volunteer job. FML

#20879963
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39512) - you deserved it (9841)

On 09/13/2013 at 6:24pm - work - by Volunteer (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML

#20883435
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41443) - you deserved it (11255)

On 09/16/2013 at 3:26am - love - by Oh hells no (man) - United States (California)

Today, a street preacher got on my metro car and gave a long, loud speech about how we sinful, polluted congressional staffers must inform our bosses that choosing a homosexual lifestyle was like trading your soul for soup. We got stuck in a tunnel for thirty minutes. FML

#20887597
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38731) - you deserved it (3754)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by CapitolSouthSux (woman) - United States



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