Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Saturday 14 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my partner walked in the room wearing a sweater from my wardrobe, making jokes about it and saying how ugly it was. That sweater was the last thing my father wore before he passed away. FML

Today, while chatting with a friend online, I told her that Kristen Stewart isn't going to star in the 50 Shades movie as she originally thought. She then spammed me with so many "NO"/"NO WAY" messages that my crappy laptop froze up, forcing me to reboot and lose a ton of unsaved essay notes. FML

#20879898
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39873) - you deserved it (10990)

On 09/13/2013 at 5:31pm - misc - by CHEERS, TUMBLTARD (woman) -

Today, I got really excited when I got an email from a guy I've been flirting with in my math class. Turns out he thinks I stole his calculator and wants it back immediately. There goes my chance. FML

#20880890
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39080) - you deserved it (3097)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:04pm - love - by crushed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was complimented by a stranger, who said I looked great in my outfit. I thanked her, and she immediately gave me a fist-bump. I stared curiously, and she explained: she was arguing with her friends about whether I'm a man or a woman. The pitch of my voice was the answer. FML

#20881965
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43233) - you deserved it (3988)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, at a family party, my uncles were complimenting my mom on her pies. I cooked them. She took all the credit. FML

#20883979
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39245) - you deserved it (3055)

On 09/16/2013 at 5:03pm - misc - by zachadams - United States (New York)

Today, my enjoyment of popping bubble wrap was yet again ruined by my excessive OCD tendencies. FML

#20887677
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34059) - you deserved it (5159)

On 09/19/2013 at 11:18am - health - by BarryShitpeas - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, my smartphone addiction reached a new level of pathetic when I checked my weather app to see if it was cloudy outside. There was a window right behind me. FML

#20887801
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15989) - you deserved it (36261)

On 09/19/2013 at 2:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while sorting through my clothes, I found one of my ex's old sweaters. After a lot of thought and difficulty, I threw it out. I felt empowered, until my father later rifled through my trash and claimed the sweater for himself. FML

#20890169
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38429) - you deserved it (3472)

On 09/21/2013 at 1:28pm - love - by gemtas5 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, in order to try and get over my slight fear of swans, I went down to the local park to feed them. One decided that I looked tastier than the bread I was throwing and chased me around the feeding area while everybody laughed. FML

#20875531
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38125) - you deserved it (5646)

On 09/10/2013 at 7:36am - animals - by Evil_Angel_90 (woman) - Australia

Today, my mother informed me that we are no longer taking my graduation trip to New York. Instead, she and her group of continuously drunk friends are going to Vegas because, "We could win the jackpot and take you on an even bigger trip to New York!" She's never won anything in her whole life. FML

#20875663
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48444) - you deserved it (3126)

On 09/10/2013 at 11:52am - money - by zcollins - United States (California)

Today, I noticed that my new colleague never laughs. Instead she says, "LOL". I have to work with her every day. FML

#20884887
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38103) - you deserved it (2571)

On 09/17/2013 at 4:26am - work - by Jienaf (man) - Malta

Today, my mom found my dad's hidden stash of cigarettes. He told her they were mine and now I have to spend two hours at therapy for my "smoking problem" every weekend. I've never smoked. FML

#20889651
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46685) - you deserved it (3121)

On 09/21/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I went to my insurance company to deal with some paperwork. One of their employees backed into my car before I made it into the building. FML

#20874631
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40814) - you deserved it (2624)

On 09/09/2013 at 5:04pm - money - by Sean - United States



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: