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Friday 26 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had to have a serious talk with my 30-year-old husband about why Sesame Street isn't a "soap opera." FML

#20811311
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41057) - you deserved it (4891)

On 07/30/2013 at 10:25am - misc - by imagrouch (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my daughter's biggest aspiration is to create a time machine for the sole purpose of going to the '70s to see the Ramones in concert. FML

#20810453
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35481) - you deserved it (8777)

On 07/29/2013 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me, saying, "I'm not ready for a serious relationship." We're supposed to get married in a month. FML

#20802342
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57826) - you deserved it (3534)

On 07/25/2013 at 1:47am - love - by anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my eldest daughter has 'officially' removed herself from our family and will no longer communicate with any of us. Apparently it's my fault that her younger sister is having a baby before her, and she can't be part of a family that 'treats her so unfairly'. FML

#20803510
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45608) - you deserved it (3899)

On 07/25/2013 at 8:51pm - kids - by JealousBratMuch - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I turned 17. My parents completely forgot it was my birthday, and when I reminded them, my dad thought it was my 18th. He was ecstatic and mentioned that I can "finally get the hell out." FML

#20816873
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50284) - you deserved it (3241)

On 08/02/2013 at 11:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, one of my bosses said, "You're going to take this as an insult, but it's not. At a certain age, women are supposed to cut their hair short." I have long hair. My bosses have all of the social skills of the guys from Big Bang Theory. FML

#20798680
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37740) - you deserved it (3352)

On 07/23/2013 at 12:23am - work - by Irreverend (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend took me to dinner. There was a beautifully decorated table with rose petals and a huge bouquet and he told me he had ordered all this for me. I'd never felt so special. That is, until I had to get up for the couple whose table it actually was. FML

#20810418
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44174) - you deserved it (3217)

On 07/29/2013 at 9:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my grandma told everyone at our party to stay away from me, saying, "Ya might catch obesity from her and become fatass porkers too." I complained to my dad, at which point my gran faked being inebriated. My dad rolled his eyes and said, "She's DRUNK, honey. Chill out." FML

#20815079
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45432) - you deserved it (5358)

On 08/01/2013 at 10:46am - misc - by fuckoffgran (woman) - Ireland

Today, I was mistaken for my twin brother twice. This probably wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't a girl. FML

#20807504
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47398) - you deserved it (4447)

On 07/28/2013 at 2:18am - misc - by Mia (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had to help my constipated dog by squeezing crap out of her butt. This is a daily occurrence. FML

Today, I watched my boyfriend flirt with a cashier and write down his number for her, through the liquor store window, while I sat in the car waiting for him to finish buying things for our "romantic movie night." FML

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

#20817380
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51234) - you deserved it (5150)

On 08/02/2013 at 5:34pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I found out why we've had to replace 3 washing machines this year. My sister thinks that "huge capacity" means "load the washing machine until no more clothes will fit." It blows the motor every time. She's 31. FML

#20806007
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49802) - you deserved it (3970)

On 07/27/2013 at 5:26am - misc - by kilamo80 (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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