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Tuesday 9 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my grandmother, who has Alzheimer's, cornered me in the kitchen and called the cops. My crime? Robbery, of my own house. FML

#20786208
64 comments

Today, I went to the grocery store with my husband, only to find that his ex-wife worked there. Then I found out he never actually divorced her. FML

#20786957
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58482) - you deserved it (4575)

On 07/16/2013 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by me:( - United States (Michigan)

Today, it's been the tenth restaurant meal in a row that my husband has to ruin with Instagram, in the belief that anyone cares. FML

#20771120
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35916) - you deserved it (4549)

On 07/08/2013 at 7:45pm - misc - by STOPTAKINGPICTURES (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I arrived in Germany for a summer-long stay. The family I'm supposed to stay with had said they spoke fluent English. They don't. I don't speak German. It's going to be a quiet two months. FML

#20772031
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42799) - you deserved it (5757)

On 07/09/2013 at 7:18am - misc - by traveling -

Today, I got head lice, so I went to a store to buy medicated shampoo. When checking out the cashier saw my shampoo and asked me to leave immediately to protect the other customers. He didn't let me buy the shampoo. FML

#20775381
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53080) - you deserved it (3146)

On 07/11/2013 at 12:52am - health - by frustrated - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got lost, and eventually noticed that I'd passed by the same house a few times. Apparently somebody who lives on that street noticed as well, because the next time I passed by, the police were waiting for me. FML

#20776976
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43910) - you deserved it (3917)

On 07/12/2013 at 12:36am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my driving instructor failed me on my test, because I forgot to turn the air conditioning off after parking. FML

#20780305
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60318) - you deserved it (5398)

On 07/13/2013 at 4:40pm - misc - by WOW (man) - Kenya

Today, my 11-year-old daughter heard the quote, "If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." She decided to test this out by letting our new puppy out of the front door. FML

#20784969
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49762) - you deserved it (4365)

On 07/15/2013 at 8:10pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML

#20770695
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43325) - you deserved it (4559)

On 07/08/2013 at 2:55pm - misc - by pinkXpress1023 - United Kingdom

Today, a friend thought it would be funny to make a R.I.P. page for me on Facebook. Most liked post? "Too bad this page is fake." FML

#20771326
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43642) - you deserved it (4894)

On 07/08/2013 at 10:02pm - misc - by the hated - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she felt that her puppy was lonely while we dated. FML

#20771661
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48463) - you deserved it (4584)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:38am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML

#20777668
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51996) - you deserved it (2756)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:28pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my water broke. I called my mom, who had agreed to watch my other two kids while I went to the hospital. When I asked her to come over, she just said, "Sorry, now isn't a good time." FML

#20781242
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47602) - you deserved it (3247)

On 07/14/2013 at 12:32am - health - by Upset Mommy - United States



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