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Wednesday 5 June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I went to get an HPV vaccine after being convinced to by my mom. I stayed in the waiting room afterwards, because the vaccine has the possible side-effect of causing fainting. I didn't faint; instead, I spent the next 15 minutes giggling uncontrollably like a psycho. FML

#20719679
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45112) - you deserved it (5375)

On 06/11/2013 at 2:41pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML

#20702628
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58196) - you deserved it (17578)

On 06/03/2013 at 12:41am - intimacy - by anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to walk home in the rain because my mom didn't want to get her new car wet. FML

#20705347
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57004) - you deserved it (3662)

On 06/04/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I decided to try wearing eyeshadow, even though I'm not that girly. When I asked for help after several failed attempts, my sister walked in and said, "It's easy, just do what I do." She put the makeup on herself and looked amazing. She's eight. FML

#20719423
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50249) - you deserved it (6526)

On 06/11/2013 at 12:11pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was at work talking to an older man. As our conversation ended, he said, "Thank you, ma'am." Then, he quickly stumbled over his words as he said, "I mean, thank you, sir. I meant sir. I think." He gazed at me for a moment in confusion, then darted away. FML

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me from jail, expecting me to bail him out. He'd tried to buy a load of booze at the liquor store and came up short by ten cents. The cashier refused to be short-changed, and he figured the only reasonable reaction was to punch her in the face. FML

#20705783
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46554) - you deserved it (4358)

On 06/04/2013 at 4:31pm - misc - by no booze, no boyfriend (woman) - United States

Today, I ran the mile in gym class. I was the second to last person to finish, and I was left panting and feeling faint. When the teacher found out I hadn't come in dead last, he accused me of skipping a lap and is now making me rerun the entire thing. FML

#20721311
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61086) - you deserved it (5962)

On 06/12/2013 at 10:56am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom walked into the bathroom while I was taking a pic to send to my long-distance boyfriend. She then told me I would go to hell for flaunting myself at guys. I was fully clothed, sending a pic to see if he liked my new haircut. That and I'm 21. FML

#20716841
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55891) - you deserved it (4273)

On 06/10/2013 at 1:13am - misc - by Crazy Mom (woman) - United States

Today, my idiot horse decided to grab a mouthful of stinging nettles while I was riding him. He panicked at the burning sensation in his mouth and bucked me off. Don't worry, though, my fall was cushioned, by the nettles. FML

#20711432
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50379) - you deserved it (4995)

On 06/07/2013 at 9:25am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to a water park with a group of friends. As I went down the water slide, some complete turd waffle of a kid in the water kicked his leg out in line with my crotch. The moment I hit the bottom was the moment I think I became sterile. FML

#20709749
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43945) - you deserved it (3253)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:24pm - health - by fuck kids (man) - United States (New York)

Today, after having spent years staying in school, working hard to achieve good grades, and avoiding all the bad kids, my mom accused me of having no direction in life and complained about how I haven't given her a grandchild yet. I'm 19. FML

#20710020
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53475) - you deserved it (3027)

On 06/06/2013 at 4:51pm - misc - by luciazee (woman) - Peru (Lima)

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

#20707414
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44253) - you deserved it (14232)

On 06/05/2013 at 12:03pm - animals - by SHIT-BREATH (man) - United Kingdom (Monmouthshire)

Today, I got to drive my mom's car. I'd recently watched the new Fast and Furious movie, I thought it'd be fun to drift around a few corners. I ended up smashing straight into someone's front yard. FML

#20712154
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19663) - you deserved it (110619)

On 06/07/2013 at 6:00pm - money - by Anonymous - United States



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