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Wednesday 22 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while grieving over the loss of my Grandpa, I called my girlfriend for comfort. After I had cheered up, she said, "Don't worry, he went to Hell anyway." FML

#20679293
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41754) - you deserved it (3126)

On 05/22/2013 at 3:14am - misc - by SadPuppy - United States

Today I returned home after a semester at university. I guess I did too good a job of getting into shape as my parents phoned the police, thinking I was a burglar. FML

#20679356
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38908) - you deserved it (3402)

On 05/22/2013 at 5:44am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, the vet sent me an email wishing my kitten a happy 2nd birthday. My cat died last year. FML

#20686886
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45161) - you deserved it (3755)

On 05/26/2013 at 4:33am - animals - by Tiber46 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to treat myself to a pedicure ahead of my cousin's wedding. The woman doing my nails asked if I wanted my toe hairs trimmed. I was so taken aback and embarrassed that I said yes. They charged me extra. FML

#20679773
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36131) - you deserved it (12786)

On 05/22/2013 at 1:40pm - misc - by hobbit - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I finally scored a goal in a soccer game. Too bad it was in our own net. FML

#20681164
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28109) - you deserved it (35449)

On 05/23/2013 at 1:55am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my roommate decided to splash out on a prostitute. When my expensive watch and the contents of my wallet turned up missing in the aftermath, his only comment was, "Shit happens, bro." FML

#20682049
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43787) - you deserved it (3951)

On 05/23/2013 at 4:11pm - misc - by eric4 (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, I cut my bangs. When I asked my boyfriend if he liked it he said, "It's like I'm dating a new girl, this way I won't get bored with you." FML

#20687072
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45587) - you deserved it (7473)

On 05/26/2013 at 10:15am - love - by thenewgirlfriend - United States (Texas)

Today, after being told by her therapist to try to make her kids a bigger part of her life because we're so distant from her, my mom's new favorite thing to do is to constantly use the words "YOLO" and "swag" around us. FML

#20691079
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49786) - you deserved it (5185)

On 05/28/2013 at 12:42pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend of ten months that I'm not ready for marriage. A few hours later he proposed at my grandma's 85th birthday party. She cried when I said no. FML

#20692547
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50694) - you deserved it (10574)

On 05/29/2013 at 1:28am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my fiancé and I were planning to move to a cheaper apartment which my mother agreed to rent us. She was very supportive and excited that we'd be closer, and it was great until she gave us a list of books, movies, games, etc. that we can't bring because they're "demonic". FML

Today, I was ditched by the guy I flew over two thousand miles to see. His excuse? "I'm just tired. I want to go home and sleep" Later, he checked in at a bar right down the street from the hotel on Facebook. FML

#20681237
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40639) - you deserved it (5064)

On 05/23/2013 at 3:13am - love - by phoenixditch - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was torn from my car and slammed against the hood because a canister of window-cleaning wipes I keep in my glove compartment apparently looks vaguely like a pipe-bomb. My lawyer agreed with the cops, and won't handle the "excessive force" case I threatened the police with. FML

#20683298
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41446) - you deserved it (3941)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:42am - misc - by JDziewaltowski (man) - United States

Today, after a sleepless night, I fell asleep at my work desk. When I awoke, I found my co-workers had duct taped me to my chair. I was yelling at them to untape me, when our boss came in, scolded me for fucking about on the job, and left without saying a word to my colleagues. FML

#20683635
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34173) - you deserved it (11420)

On 05/24/2013 at 12:08pm - work - by anthony512 (man) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)



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