Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Wednesday 22 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I heard my grandma sobbing in her room. After finally convincing her to tell me what was wrong, she confessed to watching a porn video last night. She thinks not being able to sleep afterwards is a sign that God is punishing her, and that she's damned our family to hell. FML

#20681811
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43780) - you deserved it (3231)

On 05/23/2013 at 1:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Buzau)

Today, I realized my family is the textbook definition of redneck after listening to my grandpa threaten to smash with an excavator the trailer that my uncle lives in behind our house if he didn't return the set of tires he had stolen and pawned from my grandpa's garage. FML

#20683275
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37439) - you deserved it (3488)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:06am - misc - by redneckfamily - United States (Washington)

Today, I was going on a blind date with a girl. She walked up to the table, said "Nah, no thanks" and left. FML

#20675286
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50708) - you deserved it (4448)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:02pm - misc - by well okay then - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I'm planning my big sister's wedding. My long-term, live-in boyfriend walked by and saw me looking at the wedding tab on Pinterest, smirked, and said, "Don't get your hopes up." I had. FML

#20674650
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52340) - you deserved it (7809)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:47am - love - by ForeverAlone (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my husband of 12 years has been sleeping with my best friend of even longer for who knows how long. She actually tried to turn it around on me and implied that it was my fault for finding out about it. FML

#20689207
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56308) - you deserved it (3351)

On 05/27/2013 at 12:17pm - love - by wow (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML

#20683433
313 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35073) - you deserved it (41919)

On 05/24/2013 at 8:26am - misc - by obnum - United States (New York)

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

#20675696
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37664) - you deserved it (4666)

On 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm - health - by pixkalexi - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, and throughout the past week, my electricity, water, cable, and Internet were progressively shut off. Why? Because my deranged mother-in-law has been stealing the money orders I use to pay my bills out of my mailbox. She also stole the late notices because she didn't want me to be "mad". FML

#20678301
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49883) - you deserved it (3200)

On 05/21/2013 at 6:47pm - money - by LightsOut - United States (Florida)

Today, on my way home on my motorbike from a great party in the early hours of the morning, I was feeling pretty good about myself. Riding over a hill, I yawned in anticipation of climbing into bed. A huge winged bastard insect thing then flew straight into my throat. FML

#20689016
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47084) - you deserved it (8737)

On 05/27/2013 at 9:42am - animals - by Nearly Crashed (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I told my boyfriend of ten months that I'm not ready for marriage. A few hours later he proposed at my grandma's 85th birthday party. She cried when I said no. FML

#20692547
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53730) - you deserved it (11180)

On 05/29/2013 at 1:28am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

#20684326
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42890) - you deserved it (6600)

On 05/24/2013 at 7:42pm - love - by yesguysgetabusedtoo (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I waxed my upper lip hair. My boyfriend later told me that he missed my mustache rubbing onto his. FML

#20689895
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48604) - you deserved it (5788)

On 05/27/2013 at 7:10pm - love - by mustache girl - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was getting out of my car, when my new neighbor asked if I'd help him unhitch a trailer. On my way over, he said, "Oh never mind, I thought you were a boy." I am a boy. FML

#20677893
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48266) - you deserved it (6804)

On 05/21/2013 at 3:05pm - misc - by Time for a haircut (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Pauline's illustrated FML
  • Come on, no need to make that face ! Yep, it's sadly the last, mournful days of Summer. People are packing up their beach balls and flip flops, putting their caravans back into storage and trying to forget…

Friday 28 August 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: