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Wednesday 1 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

#20646330
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24169) - you deserved it (48434)

On 05/06/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by clumsy - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was out jogging, when I saw a girl fall off her bike and start crying. I ran over to see if she was hurt. Apparently her neighbour thought I was trying to kidnap her, because he ran out with a baseball bat and threatened to beat me to death if I didn't get lost. FML

#20647971
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45878) - you deserved it (2726)

On 05/07/2013 at 4:21pm - kids - by bet a woman would've been thanked (man) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, I spent hours playing my guitar and singing in the street, hoping to make some extra cash. About 3 hours in, I realized some punk had been walking around with a hat taking money as if he was with me. FML

#20633517
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44367) - you deserved it (5019)

On 04/30/2013 at 8:31pm - money - by honeynuggetviolin -

Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML

#20635835
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48604) - you deserved it (2234)

On 05/01/2013 at 9:52pm - work - by Paul (man) - United States

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend. Being the mature one, I went up to her and said, "Hey, how's it going?" She maced me and kept walking. FML

#20644793
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46106) - you deserved it (10110)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:06am - misc - by wat_dafuq_bro (man) -

Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML

#20645667
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51624) - you deserved it (8555)

On 05/06/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by stretchy - United States (Maryland)

Today, my boss asked me to read through a document. I gave my feedback, saying it seemed like it had been written by an 8-year-old. Turns out it was in fact written by him. FML

#20649842
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40873) - you deserved it (14715)

On 05/08/2013 at 12:59pm - work - by anon_1996 - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my co-worker and I played a game where we give each other the bird in whatever creative manner we could come up with. Deciding to be sneaky, I hid behind a wall with my middle finger up as I heard him walking into the office. It was my boss. FML

#20635309
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15973) - you deserved it (35886)

On 05/01/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML

#20639773
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47119) - you deserved it (4274)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:30pm - work - by annoyedgirl - United States (Washington)

Today, after my mom picked me up from the mall, she asked me what was in my bag from Gap. I wouldn't tell her, and she ended up grounding me. It was her Mother's Day present. FML

#20645473
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58658) - you deserved it (4483)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:08pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I finally got a phone call from a publisher saying they would publish the book I'd written. I'd gotten loads of rejection letters, so I was so excited. Until I realized it was my dad, feeling sorry for me. FML

#20646182
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42574) - you deserved it (3301)

On 05/06/2013 at 7:43pm - work - by sobasics - United States

Today, after a night of heavy drinking, I woke up handcuffed to my bed. My friends who are responsible for this think it's hilarious and claimed not to remember where they put the keys. They took pictures, then left. FML

#20649461
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39515) - you deserved it (14355)

On 05/08/2013 at 7:05am - misc - by Sebastian20 (man) - Netherlands (Groningen)

Today, it's my birthday. Three people wished me happy birthday: Google, my insurance company, and the place I lease my car from. FML

#20649920
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52258) - you deserved it (3865)

On 05/08/2013 at 1:48pm - misc - by trice (woman) - United States (Texas)



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