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Thursday 25 April 2013

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Today, I took my Spanish test, and I felt very confident. I got the test back later, and saw my teacher had written on it: "Congrats on the 94%, but I know you cheated." FML

by Anonymous / 04/23/2013 at 12:24pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog became scared of his own food bowl. He now barks for ages every time he sees it. FML

by conbon123 / 04/29/2013 at 3:20am / United States (Oregon) / Animals

Today, after 2 months of my new neighbours' kids throwing rocks at our cars, constantly swearing at us, bullying my siblings in and out of school, and vandalising our property, their mother has convinced the landlord that we're the ones out of control. FML

by neighbour hell / 04/25/2013 at 1:56pm / Norway (Vest-Agder) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got home and noticed people were looking at my next-door neighbor's house that is for rent. Peering closer, I realized my ex-boyfriend and the girl he cheated on me with a few months ago are inside. After they left, the "for rent" sign came down. I've got new neighbors. FML

by nodullmoment / 04/25/2013 at 11:01pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, as I was walking down the street, a car full of hot girls pulled up and asked if I wanted to party; obviously, I said yes. They then shot at me with party poppers and threw party food all over me. FML

by KingUrge / 04/26/2013 at 4:36am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was yelled at and called a pedophile by a mom for talking to her 5 year old girl. I work at a library and she looked like she needed help. This is the third time it has happened. FML

by LibraryPedo / 04/25/2013 at 9:37pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, nobody wants to hang out with me due to a nasty rumor that my ex has spread. No one will tell me what was said, because I apparently "know full well" what I did. FML

by dabull / 04/27/2013 at 1:02am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML

by Paul / 05/01/2013 at 9:52pm / United States / Work

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

by shatMyself / 04/22/2013 at 3:10pm / United States / Health

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because he says I need to learn how to be happy without relying on him. I'm not a clinger, I'm just unhappy because my dad recently passed away, my best friend turned on me, and I lost out on the exchange program of my dreams. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2013 at 12:35pm / Denmark / Love

Today, I had a big party planned. All but one of the guests cancelled. See you at 7, mom. FML

by Anonymous / 04/29/2013 at 12:09pm / Netherlands / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent a girl a friendly conversation starter on Facebook. She replied, "I know what you guys are like. Oh, and that invitation to a date in about 5 messages time? Not a chance." FML

by Porter_Robinson / 04/30/2013 at 4:50am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, while paying a $60 tab on drinks for a girl, a guy grabs the money-clip out of my hand and runs. I start to chase after him; the girl trips me, then runs after him. The bartender calls the cops; not to catch the thieves, but to report me for not paying. FML

by Alexman1985 / 05/01/2013 at 6:30am / Money