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Thursday 18 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had a note to skip P.E. that my grandpa had written because my mom was busy. His handwriting is terrible, so they didn't believe that he'd written it. I'd twisted my ankle and I got to run another mile for "lying". FML

#20615089
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47112) - you deserved it (3887)

On 04/23/2013 at 1:25am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, my grandpa moved into the apartment next door. The walls are wafer-thin. Goodbye sex life. FML

Today, for the fifth time since my parents got divorced, my father has decided he doesn't want to pick me up for his weekend because I'm "too responsible to have fun with." FML

#20596320
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42284) - you deserved it (5819)

On 04/16/2013 at 12:17pm - misc - by ouch - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was small talking with an elderly man, who told me that nobody cares about him. Even though I had only known him for an hour, to try and make him feel a little better I told him I care about him. He then called me a creep, stomped his cane onto my foot, and walked off. FML

#20612321
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43593) - you deserved it (6902)

On 04/22/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by 'creep' - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out I was an alcoholic. Not from my friends or family, but because the ice-maker couldn't keep up with the amount of drinks I've been making. FML

#20614650
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33558) - you deserved it (18798)

On 04/22/2013 at 10:48pm - misc - by KyngJulian - United States

Today, my husband tried to haggle a blowjob out of me in exchange for taking his first shower in nearly two weeks. FML

#20605100
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45793) - you deserved it (7084)

On 04/19/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He wants us to stay friends, though, so he can continue to use my coffee maker. FML

#20593450
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45689) - you deserved it (4511)

On 04/15/2013 at 12:02pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my crew was called out to do some house maintenance. We were nearly done, when someone had the goddamned fucking brilliant idea of washing plaster off their hands in the kitchen sink, which clogged the pipes. Instead of getting paid, we now owe for damages. FML

#20607182
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43334) - you deserved it (5238)

On 04/20/2013 at 10:26am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I realized how tiny my apartment is, when I was able to vacuum from bedroom to bathroom through the living room without switching the power outlet from the one in the kitchen. I pay a fortune to live in this shoebox. FML

#20608013
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44302) - you deserved it (9737)

On 04/20/2013 at 4:22pm - money - by citylife - United States

Today, it wasn't until I heard something fly off the roof of my car and hit the trunk, then asphalt, that I remembered where I left my phone while unlocking the car door. FML

#20598583
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28407) - you deserved it (34900)

On 04/17/2013 at 1:51am - money - by Anonymous -

Today, I just remembered that I changed my Gmail display name to "Rice Ball" out of privacy-paranoia a while back. I've been using this same email to apply to several professional jobs. FML

#20592754
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16827) - you deserved it (37510)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:58am - misc - by geeshock1987 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to a library to return a book that I've had for years. After a heated discussion with the librarian, not only did she charge me over a hundred dollars for the book, she also called the cops to escort me out. FML

#20595392
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25153) - you deserved it (44991)

On 04/16/2013 at 12:01am - money - by LoLWut?? nd Why?? - United States

Today, my husband rejected sleeping with me because he wants to "save his energy" for building his custom car. Apparently, I'm a "distraction." FML

#20615528
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45666) - you deserved it (6104)

On 04/23/2013 at 9:38am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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