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Wednesday 20 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, a few months after my co-worker had stopped wearing her engagement ring, I decided to put on the moves and start flirting with her. I soon found out that her fiancé had died, and that she's nowhere near over him, despite her brave face. I feel like a total asshole. FML

#20558292
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47313) - you deserved it (24391)

On 03/24/2013 at 5:33pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, we had to re-live sex ed in my college biology class. Unlike in middle school, nobody giggled incessantly. However, the guy sitting next to me stared at me intensely for nearly the whole three hour lecture. FML

#20552364
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36321) - you deserved it (3231)

On 03/20/2013 at 3:45pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, on Facebook, I mentioned that I'd just finished reading the novel Pet Sematary. Two hours later, I'd lost two friends and my boyfriend, after they commented "learn to spell, dumbass", "u illiterate fucker", and "well, I'm not dating you for your brains, am I?" I hate humanity. FML

#20555478
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34263) - you deserved it (7474)

On 03/22/2013 at 8:02pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Georgia)

Today, my superstitious girlfriend of 4 years sneezed in the middle of my proposal. She claimed it was a sign from the universe for us to break up and then immediately left. FML

#20550300
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44923) - you deserved it (3399)

On 03/19/2013 at 12:40am - love - by lanz4949 - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I spent three hours painstakingly installing and configuring some parental control software on my 11-year-old son's laptop after I caught him watching porn. Barely an hour after returning the laptop, I caught him watching yet more porn on it. FML

#20557646
319 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33450) - you deserved it (13599)

On 03/24/2013 at 6:30am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boss threatened to fire me because of a tattoo I have. It's a small teddy bear on my leg with my parents' names on it. My workplace has no problems with tattoos, but my boss said it was "unoriginal and lame." It's a memorial tattoo; my parents died last year. FML

#20560852
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51650) - you deserved it (3256)

On 03/26/2013 at 10:54am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, after I had changed my number to get away from my abusive ex, my mom decided to give him my new one. She insists that I need to give him another chance. FML

#20556707
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50925) - you deserved it (3083)

On 03/23/2013 at 4:15pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to turn my life around and start exercising more. I didn't even make it out the door before I tripped and fractured my ankle. FML

#20550992
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36642) - you deserved it (4285)

On 03/19/2013 at 3:35pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I walked into an exam after having stayed up 20 straight hours studying. The professor looked at me and muttered, "Don't bother, I'm failing you either way." FML

#20552400
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44040) - you deserved it (5082)

On 03/20/2013 at 4:26pm - misc - by Tired (man) - United States

Today, a man attempted to sue my business for giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I called the cops on him for disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll put 'not edible' on your label." FML

#20561443
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33244) - you deserved it (3417)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I finally got the courage to tell the girl I like how I really feel about her, due in no small part to how flirty she's been towards me lately. Turns out she's really just a skank and was trying to make my best friend "jealous". He's gay. FML

#20553905
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39219) - you deserved it (3941)

On 03/21/2013 at 4:43pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I was complaining to my husband about a busty but vapid celebrity, and he replied, "She doesn't need brains, honey, she has boobs. You wouldn't understand." FML

#20557361
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34876) - you deserved it (6232)

On 03/24/2013 at 1:14am - love - by Beestings (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my picture from a dating profile was so "hilarious" that people have been posting it on Instagram with mean captions. FML

#20557606
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39833) - you deserved it (5765)

On 03/24/2013 at 4:59am - misc - by And I'm still single - United States (California)



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