Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38034) - you deserved it (2305)
On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States
Today, I agreed to help out my 4-year crush with his senior prank which is to pretend we are dating for 1 day to freak everyone out. Glad to know dating me is prank worthy. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50212) - you deserved it (7225)
On 05/12/2013 at 10:08am - love - by turdtonomor9 - United States
Today, I learned my husband has what he calls "grumpy wife sex" specifically to cheer me up. I don't know if I'm more annoyed that he casually mentioned it after we've been together for 10 years, or that it actually works. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34662) - you deserved it (9850)
On 05/02/2013 at 11:59am - intimacy - by MommaAnnie (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I met my new roommate. She has a life-size cardboard cutout of Justin Bieber in her room, which I've seen her having actual conversations with twice already. I have to share a bedroom with this psycho. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46193) - you deserved it (3544)
On 05/04/2013 at 1:46pm - misc - by immovingout (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bed, I dreamed that she broke up with me, again. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33261) - you deserved it (4333)
On 05/18/2013 at 1:22am - love - by Sarsippius -
Today, I lost my patience and asked the deadbeat I loaned money to last year to please pay up. His response: "Blow me." No thanks, dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39841) - you deserved it (4457)
On 05/13/2013 at 5:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50153) - you deserved it (6097)
On 05/12/2013 at 12:35am - misc - by lamsolonely - United States
Today, I had my college graduation ceremony. As I was walking across the stage, some asshat, in front of over 55,000 students and staff, brazenly ran across the stage, snatched my diploma up out of the president's hand, and ran off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49680) - you deserved it (3139)
On 05/09/2013 at 6:11am - misc - by Uwrongfodat (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45088) - you deserved it (3093)
On 05/09/2013 at 3:01am - love - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my doorknob broke. While trying to impress my dad and show that I can fix things for girls, I somehow managed to lock myself in my room, with the doorknob on the other side of the door. When my dad finally heard my screams, he let me out. He had to take the whole door off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29418) - you deserved it (16126)
On 05/14/2013 at 1:03pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was leaving my doctor's appointment when a nurse stopped me. She exclaimed, "Wow you are so skinny! What's your secret?" My secret? Having an autoimmune disease. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43438) - you deserved it (2386)
On 05/08/2013 at 10:17am - health - by HamSandwich12 (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my girlfriend was visiting, and while in the bathroom, she clogged the toilet. Since there was no plunger in the room, she unclogged it with the only thing she could find: my mother's hairbrush. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35147) - you deserved it (4118)
On 05/13/2013 at 1:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, working at a fast food restaurant, I was cleaning dishes in the back. I started to sing to myself. During the chorus I heard the echo of my voice in my ear. My boss had pushed the talk button on my headset so every staff member and everyone in the lobby could hear me over the intercom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37712) - you deserved it (7513)
On 05/10/2013 at 12:44am - work - by legit247 - United States (Missouri)
Monday 20 May 2013
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