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December 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got a new downstairs neighbor. Herpes. FML

#21318606
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22597) - you deserved it (30074)

On 12/16/2014 at 4:04pm - health - by fuck - Norway (Buskerud)

Today, while I was on a field trip with my son, my husband decided to get rid of our dog without asking anyone. Now I get to pick up the pieces of a broken heart, and he thinks he did nothing wrong. FML

#21311410
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32185) - you deserved it (2471)

On 12/04/2014 at 1:30pm - animals - by yolonono (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I enjoyed the soft caressing touch of the person I'm attracted to. It would have been even better if he weren't simply stroking my arm hair in amazement at its superior length and density. FML

#21313670
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29269) - you deserved it (4275)

On 12/08/2014 at 9:12am - love - by lovethateuropeanblood (woman) - Japan (Osaka)

Today, I found out first-hand that the most horrifying sight you can ever witness is two morbidly obese people getting nasty with each other in a dance club's run-down, public restroom. FML

#21316146
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29174) - you deserved it (4181)

On 12/12/2014 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)

Today, my dad and grandpa came to a charity event that I helped set up for people who have autism. I appreciated their support, until I heard my dad say "Man, some of these 'tards are pretty hot." and my grandpa replying "Yeah. Probably like dead fish in bed, though." FML

#21316987
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31324) - you deserved it (2506)

On 12/13/2014 at 9:02pm - misc - by ashamed (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my boyfriend sent Christmas Carollers to my house to tell me he was breaking up with me. FML

Today, I beat my boyfriend in a video game. He promptly dumped me and told me to leave. FML

#21319982
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28543) - you deserved it (3480)

On 12/18/2014 at 9:39pm - love - by I warned him - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was having a nice conversation with my fiancé when he said out of nowhere, "I sold some of your panties". I thought he was joking so I said I hoped they weren't any of my favorites. He wasn't joking, though, and now some stranger from Craigslist owns my panties. FML

#21317090
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28592) - you deserved it (2542)

On 12/14/2014 at 12:15am - misc - by konacoffee17 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML

#21320382
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22633) - you deserved it (3929)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I had my midterm finals for AP Literature. My teacher had good news and bad news for us. The bad news? That he lost the file for our original exam and so had to make a harder exam for us. An exam he told us not to study for. The good news? "Jesus Christ suffered and died for our sins." FML

#21319606
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29388) - you deserved it (2742)

On 12/18/2014 at 7:11am - misc - by subversivepanda (woman) - Guam

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML

#21319192
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36044) - you deserved it (2434)

On 12/17/2014 at 3:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I woke up with a swollen lump on my throat. It's extremely painful. My dad named it Gretchen and now talks about it as if it's a person. FML

#21311698
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26741) - you deserved it (2198)

On 12/04/2014 at 10:29pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I asked my teacher how old he was, and jokingly I said, "50?" Then he chuckled, so I laughed and said, "I was kidding… 42, 43, 44?" He then looked at me and said, "Are you trying to guess my age, or your grade percent in this class?" FML

#21315734
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19916) - you deserved it (25291)

On 12/11/2014 at 6:13pm - work - by IHateSchool-.- - United States



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