Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

November 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML

#21301367
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32904) - you deserved it (3215)

On 11/18/2014 at 12:26pm - misc - by drugsforthugs - United States (California)

Today, I spent all day making preparations and buying food for my upcoming birthday. It's not for a party, though - none of my friends wanted to come. I'm preparing for the launch of the new World of Warcraft expansion. FML

#21295219
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30645) - you deserved it (6513)

On 11/09/2014 at 2:51am - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I was counselling a soon-to-be teen mom. She has a younger step-brother, and when I asked her how she handled him when he cries, she said, "Oh, that's when you cover their face until they stop!" FML

#21300330
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28287) - you deserved it (1996)

On 11/16/2014 at 9:25pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

#21301827
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27454) - you deserved it (2928)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:27am - intimacy - by jigglypluff (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my dad got so drunk that he forgot my name. He started calling me "It". FML

#21295011
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34660) - you deserved it (2813)

On 11/08/2014 at 9:36pm - misc - by ItGirl - Sweden (Sodermanlands Lan)

Today, my wife slapped me for touching her boobs during sex. FML

#21296872
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43039) - you deserved it (4649)

On 11/11/2014 at 10:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, at the gym, some muscle head idiot started yelling at the treadmill for not going fast enough, and I muttered "roid rage". Apparently said roids give him superhuman hearing, because he heard me from the other side of the room, and threatened to kill me. FML

#21297627
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28658) - you deserved it (8207)

On 11/12/2014 at 11:00am - health - by juggalomurderer59 (man) - United States

Today, I was a pregnant man for Halloween. Everyone at school thought it was funny, except my principal, who gave me a detention and said it was, "inappropriate and making a pregnant teacher feel uncomfortable". That pregnant teacher asked me to take a selfie with her. FML

#21289257
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34441) - you deserved it (2144)

On 10/31/2014 at 7:28pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I found out that my mom is doing a study and is keeping used pads in the freezer. FML

#21298678
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32218) - you deserved it (2219)

On 11/13/2014 at 10:39pm - money - by PPP - United States (Illinois)

Today, my boyfriend threatened to break up with me if I don't satisfy his "needs." By "needs", he means me wearing a diaper during foreplay. FML

#21297687
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38942) - you deserved it (4182)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by honey, no boo-boo (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that the house I've been living in and paying rent for the past two months was never advertised as vacant. I learned this when the actual homeowners walked in, and called the police for an "intruder." FML

#21291174
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35485) - you deserved it (2992)

On 11/03/2014 at 10:54am - money - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, I met my sister's fiancé. I would have been happier for her if he hadn't been mine a month ago when I introduced them. FML

#21301904
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31431) - you deserved it (2208)

On 11/19/2014 at 3:27am - love - by MissAggravared - United States (Idaho)

Today, I finally got off my lazy ass and start studying for my upcoming exam. It was going pretty well, until my classmate called and after I proudly told him about my sudden motivation, the only thing he had to say was, "You got the date wrong, the exam was on thursday." FML

#21290636
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20198) - you deserved it (23421)

On 11/02/2014 at 4:38pm - work - by demotivator (woman) - Romania (Timis)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: