Today, I learned that my mother counts my jeans as two pairs when she counts how many she's putting in for a load of wash. I've gotten that fat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20429) - you deserved it (31220)
On 05/04/2013 at 8:41pm - misc - by Fatty Fatty Fatso (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my dog had her stomach pumped because she ate some cookies. The 100 cookies I made for a bake sale to be exact. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34246) - you deserved it (5247)
On 05/02/2013 at 8:50am - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my roommate decided to splash out on a prostitute. When my expensive watch and the contents of my wallet turned up missing in the aftermath, his only comment was, "Shit happens, bro." FML
I agree, your life sucks (29829) - you deserved it (2576)
On 05/23/2013 at 4:11pm - misc - by eric4 (man) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)
Today, I received a notice that if I don't move the abandoned vehicle from outside my house it will be repossessed at my expense. My car isn't abandoned. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34337) - you deserved it (3229)
On 05/14/2013 at 1:29am - misc - by CrappyCar (woman) - United States
Today, and throughout the past week, my electricity, water, cable, and Internet were progressively shut off. Why? Because my deranged mother-in-law has been stealing the money orders I use to pay my bills out of my mailbox. She also stole the late notices because she didn't want me to be "mad". FML
I agree, your life sucks (35646) - you deserved it (2185)
On 05/21/2013 at 6:47pm - money - by LightsOut - United States (Florida)
Today, my allergies started up with a vengeance. Yesterday I broke 4 ribs and fractured my sternum. Every time I sneeze, I swear I can feel the broken bones move around. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38073) - you deserved it (2231)
On 05/20/2013 at 1:44am - health - by KatielSilver - United States (Washington)
Today, my parents scoured my browser history, certain that I have a hidden Facebook account that I'm using to get up to no good. Their reasoning was that there's no way my only friends are my relatives and that all I can post about is about the weather. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36147) - you deserved it (6066)
On 05/11/2013 at 1:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my fiancé and I were planning to move to a cheaper apartment which my mother agreed to rent us. She was very supportive and excited that we'd be closer, and it was great until she gave us a list of books, movies, games, etc. that we can't bring because they're "demonic". FML
I agree, your life sucks (31593) - you deserved it (3792)
On 05/20/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by ElhonnaDS (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I gave a big presentation to my class. It included PowerPoint slides and video clips of the country I'd been researching. Another student did a presentation on the same country, except he just read from its Wikipedia page. He practically got a standing ovation. I got a single clap. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38672) - you deserved it (2728)
On 05/03/2013 at 12:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)
Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32189) - you deserved it (11382)
On 05/12/2013 at 12:37pm - misc - by walmart: first time, last time (man) - United States
Today, my grandpa moved into the house to live with my family. Along with having to share a room with him, he swears that having the AC on will give him pneumonia, and he keeps saying he's "freezing" when the temperature inside gets below 85. We live in Nevada. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37512) - you deserved it (2646)
On 05/11/2013 at 5:58pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I had to share my room with my cousin while she stayed over. I let her take my bed while I slept on the floor. Not only do my back and neck hurt, but I had to clean vomit out of my hair. Apparently, she "wasn't feeling well" last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43544) - you deserved it (3552)
On 05/04/2013 at 9:32am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, as usual, my mom got shitfaced and started berating me for something. This time, it was for missing a therapy appointment. Not only am I unable to drive, it was her appointment. For her alcoholism. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37137) - you deserved it (1983)
On 05/15/2013 at 2:21am - health - by the only sober one (woman) - United States (California)
Friday 24 May 2013
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