Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

March 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was given a new responsibility at the law firm where I work. I'm now in charge of punching holes in every single piece of paper to be found in the office, estimated to be in the hundred-thousands. The reason? I finish my daily clerical work too quickly. FML

#21372587
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25000) - you deserved it (2145)

On 03/11/2015 at 4:15pm - work - by KillMePlease (man) - United States (New York)

Today, we got CCTV fitted in our store. My lovely boss told me he'll be spending his free time watching the footage on his phone to know what I get up to when he's not in. FML

#21379507
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22065) - you deserved it (2473)

On 03/22/2015 at 2:19pm - work - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, after several months of eating right, exercising, and weight loss, my mother has yet again arrived at my house, unannounced and with a very sugary cake. She's been doing this most weeks since I lost 50 pounds. FML

#21373752
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10) - you deserved it (2090)

On 03/13/2015 at 11:02am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to sit in a three-seat truck between my dad and his best friend on a 4-hour trip to Detroit. It was great, besides their incessant crude jokes and stories, including chafing ball sacks, and naming their new radio station, "Chicks With Dicks Radio." FML

#21380298
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23150) - you deserved it (2273)

On 03/23/2015 at 7:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's been a week since I was dumped. I planned to stay at my apartment, cry and eat chocolate in peace. My roommate decided to have loud sex with her boyfriend in the apartment. She refused to quiet down, saying "My body, my rules." FML

#21379056
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27074) - you deserved it (3513)

On 03/21/2015 at 5:59pm - intimacy - by stoprubbingitinmyface (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents for the first time. I thought everything went well, until I got a text from him later saying, "Come on mom, she isn't THAT bad." FML

#21375407
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29534) - you deserved it (2135)

On 03/16/2015 at 12:10am - love - by anon - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a call from a potential employer. Unfortunately, I couldn't understand the man due to his incoherent mumbling. I had to decline the job after asking him to repeat everything he said, over and over again. I still don't know exactly which job I declined. FML

#21368765
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24850) - you deserved it (2043)

On 03/05/2015 at 5:26pm - work - by phishy (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I met my girlfriend's parents for the first time. Within minutes, they said I needed to leave. Their reason? Apparently, I was mocking her dad's speech impediment. I also have one but they wouldn't believe me. FML

#21382684
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28420) - you deserved it (1688)

On 03/27/2015 at 10:12pm - love - by biblepain - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found out my husband has been sleeping with one of the women in our marriage counselling group. FML

#21373841
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34737) - you deserved it (2398)

On 03/13/2015 at 2:47pm - love - by scared and alone (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was asked when my baby is due. My baby was due 6 months ago. FML

#21381725
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27630) - you deserved it (3840)

On 03/26/2015 at 4:35am - kids - by sexybelly - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a dream that I was making pancakes. I need to get out more. FML

#21373068
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24802) - you deserved it (4194)

On 03/12/2015 at 9:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I accidentally ate a cat treat instead of a cinnamon glazed pecan. I thought it must have been burnt by the way it tasted, so ate a few more before I figured out my mistake and spat them out. FML

#21376174
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22486) - you deserved it (12249)

On 03/17/2015 at 3:14am - animals - by ilovecharliesheen (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while driving, I saw someone's hubcap blowing away behind me on the highway. I thought it was funny and sort of chuckled to myself. Later I realized it was my hubcap. FML

#21375160
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15999) - you deserved it (24094)

On 03/15/2015 at 5:12pm - misc - by epicvixen - Canada (British Columbia)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: