Today, I told my dad that I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. He responded by blaring sad breakup songs as loud as he could throughout the house, just to see me "cry like a bitch". FML
I agree, your life sucks (37371) - you deserved it (5684)
On 05/18/2013 at 6:33pm - love - by SteroidPenguin (man) - United States (Colorado)
Today, my mom came back from a major surgery. She also had a yeast infection. I had to push the applicator in because she couldn't bend down. This cannot be unfelt. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43971) - you deserved it (2365)
On 05/04/2013 at 7:26pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, I spent hours playing my guitar and singing in the street, hoping to make some extra cash. About 3 hours in, I realized some punk had been walking around with a hat taking money as if he was with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38710) - you deserved it (4071)
On 04/30/2013 at 8:31pm - money - by honeynuggetviolin -
Today, my cousin thought it would be funny to make copies of my house keys and give it to random people on the street. I live alone and work a 12 hour shift daily. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44859) - you deserved it (2585)
Today, I overheard my boyfriend admitting that he's only dating me because having me around "sucks a bit less than fucking my own hand". FML
I agree, your life sucks (44426) - you deserved it (4031)
On 05/03/2013 at 5:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Germany
Today, I listened to my elderly bachelor neighbor moan, "Oh, kitty, kitty, kitty! Oh kitty!" for over half-an-hour before he wandered out on his balcony in wet, tight white underwear to water his plant. This is the fifth time this week, and I still don't know what on earth he's doing. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32921) - you deserved it (2419)
On 05/20/2013 at 11:56am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my wife told me that getting in the mood to have sex with me is like trying to get in the mood to hit the treadmill. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44537) - you deserved it (5775)
On 05/03/2013 at 8:13am - intimacy - by Who1s269 (man) - United States
Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43507) - you deserved it (1648)
On 05/01/2013 at 9:52pm - work - by Paul (man) - United States
Today, after finding out that I would never be able to move my dominant arm again, I decided to talk to my best friend about it because it was getting to me. She responded with, "It really bugs me that you made this conversation all about you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (40307) - you deserved it (2298)
On 05/15/2013 at 7:43pm - health - by LordCrafte (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I was wearing a black shirt, black pants, and a black beanie at a grocery store. I came around a corner, bumped into a woman and she screamed, "Murderer." I was immediately thrown out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38054) - you deserved it (8491)
On 05/15/2013 at 3:20am - misc - by notarobber (man) - United States (California)
Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend. Being the mature one, I went up to her and said, "Hey, how's it going?" She maced me and kept walking. FML
I agree, your life sucks (41158) - you deserved it (9169)
Today, it's my birthday. I worked late, so I was looking forward to spending a quiet evening with my husband. When he suggested we go grocery shopping, I got excited thinking he had organized a surprise party or something. He actually just took me grocery shopping. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42861) - you deserved it (7755)
On 05/07/2013 at 8:48am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my sisters and I pitched together nearly $500 to send my mom to the spa for Mother's Day. We put the printed sheet with her info into a little box with our card on top. When she opened it, she freaked out and started hugging my dad. Turns out he switched the cards and took all the credit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50659) - you deserved it (2992)
On 05/12/2013 at 8:09am - misc - by lachaisse - United States (Ohio)
Monday 20 May 2013
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