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April 2015

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got disappointed when I realized that I had to share a bed with my husband because we had company over. FML

#21389862
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22454) - you deserved it (16214)

On 04/08/2015 at 6:52am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she'd leave me for her ex in a heartbeat. Tomorrow is, or should I say "was", our wedding day. FML

#21399347
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24642) - you deserved it (1417)

On 04/25/2015 at 3:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I was called a fascist and accused of being "racist" against poor people, all because some crazy meth-mouthed bitch couldn't afford some booze and expected me to cut the price by almost 40% so she could. FML

#21392314
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27119) - you deserved it (1857)

On 04/12/2015 at 11:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I discovered why my pet bird has been hiding behind my couch pillow lately. It's not because she was nesting, as I thought. She's been secretly tearing apart the whole couch from behind there instead. FML

#21395798
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24447) - you deserved it (4027)

On 04/18/2015 at 3:34pm - animals - by thisisnotavirustrustme.exe (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my roommate wants to kick me out because I can't afford to pay my share of the rent this month. I couldn't afford to, because I had to pay for repairs to my car after my roommate got drunk, stole my keys, and crashed it into a street light. FML

#21394027
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35813) - you deserved it (2585)

On 04/15/2015 at 10:32am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

#21397889
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29097) - you deserved it (2640)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my husband admitted that he's been spying on me for the last 5 years to see if I was cheating, out of paranoia brought on by his own cheating for all 5 of those years. FML

#21398951
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25958) - you deserved it (1570)

On 04/24/2015 at 10:12am - love - by LolaBell (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was bitten by a therapy dog. FML

#21399578
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19405) - you deserved it (2123)

On 04/25/2015 at 4:42pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I complimented a player in a game who protected my ass the whole match. As a joke, I told them to marry me. Turned out the person was a horny 40-something lesbian stalker who spent the next 5 hours sending me pictures and trying to find out where I live. FML

#21398988
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23630) - you deserved it (4672)

On 04/24/2015 at 12:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML

#21396226
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28210) - you deserved it (2866)

On 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm - animals - by woof? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I learned that before you tell a blonde joke, you should make sure that your high school's 6'8", 275-pound, blond quarterback isn't standing behind you. FML

Today, I was forced into accepting a "promotion" for a position that pays less than what I get right now. FML

#21387438
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27960) - you deserved it (2680)

On 04/04/2015 at 8:42am - work - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I got grounded because my mom found a condom in the bathroom trashcan and assumed it was mine. I took the blame because I was too embarrassed to admit that it must have belonged to my 13-year-old brother, since I'm still a virgin at 19. FML

#21391452
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30106) - you deserved it (4647)

On 04/10/2015 at 7:16pm - misc - by uglybrother (man) - United States (Texas)



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