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September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. We are on a cruise together. She has already found another room to sleep in. FML

#20899028
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48741) - you deserved it (3180)

On 09/28/2013 at 11:21am - love - by Christian (man) - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

#20899091
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44842) - you deserved it (3860)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Serbia

Today, I found out my grandma wears dentures when I had to fish them out of a cooler. She lost them bobbing for beer at a local bar. FML

#20875421
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34088) - you deserved it (2307)

On 09/10/2013 at 3:04am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I started my new internship at a vet clinic. By the end of the day I had: been peed on, scratched, forced to stuff a dead dog into a plastic bag, thrown up and almost passed out. I need to rethink my future career. FML

Today, at a job interview, I was asked what I thought of twerking. It was a bizarre question, but trying to get on the interviewer's good side, I said I thought it was pretty cool. He snorted and said I'll be job-seeking for a while yet. FML

#20870423
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21273) - you deserved it (42439)

On 09/06/2013 at 5:23pm - work - by howprofessional (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, when my husband asked me what the password to my new computer is, I told him it was the month and year of our marriage. He couldn't figure out the password. FML

#20872459
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44105) - you deserved it (6480)

On 09/08/2013 at 1:42am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was showing my 6-year-old son how easy and safe it is to ride a bike. I didn't notice a pebble, bust up my leg and my son is now terrified of bicycles. FML

#20897147
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34119) - you deserved it (5564)

On 09/26/2013 at 6:56pm - kids - by NoBikesForYou (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, I bought some really expensive face wipes that were supposed to cure my awful acne. I was excited to use them until I found out my mom had used them all wiping down her car. FML

Today, while riding the bus, the person next to me broke into a coughing fit. Fortunately, he covered his mouth. Unfortunately, he used my arm. FML

#20889355
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37834) - you deserved it (2523)

On 09/20/2013 at 7:58pm - misc - by -.- - United States (California)

Today, I started my new job at a restaurant I really like. As I waited on my first customer, I suggested that he try the apple pie, because it's my favourite. He looked up at me and said, "Yeah? Figures! Lay off 'em, porky!" FML

#20891546
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43946) - you deserved it (5585)

On 09/22/2013 at 2:00pm - work - by -_- (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out that my controlling, verbally abusive ex-boyfriend from nearly four years ago is still obsessed with me. Apparently, he's told everyone back home that he and I are getting married as soon as I finish college. We haven't spoken in over two years. FML

#20897674
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42655) - you deserved it (2691)

On 09/27/2013 at 2:20am - love - by kitkat3308 - United States

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

#20889155
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48071) - you deserved it (3567)

On 09/20/2013 at 5:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Hungary (Szeged)

Today, I realized the only "person" I have talked to in the last two days is Siri. FML

#20891258
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35818) - you deserved it (7825)

On 09/22/2013 at 9:34am - misc - by me - United States (Texas)



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