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June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mother came into my workplace to wail on me for "ruining our family's reputation" because I got a girl pregnant. I've been married to the "girl" for 8 years. FML

#20720453
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60543) - you deserved it (3029)

On 06/11/2013 at 10:12pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, after years of researching and saving money, I got a pet fox. I was able to enjoy the majesty of the animal for three hours before it burrowed under the fence and ran away. FML

#20717566
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35271) - you deserved it (51741)

On 06/10/2013 at 2:01pm - animals - by SadFoxLady (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, after finally seeing a psychologist about the death of my dad and spending the longest hour of my life confessing every thought I've experienced in the 6 years since his passing, my psychologist asked me if I was walking home or if my dad would be picking me up. FML

#20705144
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76921) - you deserved it (3656)

On 06/04/2013 at 8:35am - health - by irishbubble (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I got to drive my mom's car. I'd recently watched the new Fast and Furious movie, I thought it'd be fun to drift around a few corners. I ended up smashing straight into someone's front yard. FML

#20712154
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19610) - you deserved it (110243)

On 06/07/2013 at 6:00pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend threw out my old voicemail recorder, thinking it was junk. My father passed away years ago. I kept a recording of the last voicemail he'd left me on it so I'd always remember his voice. FML

#20718168
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76330) - you deserved it (3853)

On 06/10/2013 at 7:35pm - misc - by Upset (woman) - United States

Today, I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. As a joke, my friend and I served him non-alcoholic beer to see how he'd react. After a while, he faked being drunk, using it as an excuse after I caught him making out with one of my so-called "friends". FML

#20709553
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53104) - you deserved it (10663)

On 06/06/2013 at 12:32pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Senegal

Today, I lost my virginity. Not only did my parents somehow find out, they posted about it on Facebook. FML

#20730822
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49013) - you deserved it (10204)

On 06/17/2013 at 1:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter found out what happens when my husband watches Mythbusters and doesn't heed the disclaimer to "Not try this at home." He feels bad about her cut face, but says he's proud he can throw a playing card that hard. FML

Today, at work, a customer came in and ordered a "Butterbeer Frappuccino." When I said we serve no such thing, she yelled at me for "lying" to her, saying she knew about our "secret menu." She ended up complaining to my manager and demanded that he fire me. FML

#20714023
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52770) - you deserved it (3998)

On 06/08/2013 at 6:20pm - work - by I hate my job (woman) - United States

Today, I woke up to my bratty younger sister cutting through my hair with a pair of scissors. I now look like a freak, and my mum bitched me out for being angry, all because my sister claimed she'd been sleep-walking. Her demented smirk said otherwise. FML

#20729503
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48942) - you deserved it (2765)

On 06/16/2013 at 2:49pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, my brother got one of those water-vapour cigarettes. I was playing around with it, and my neighbour saw me through the window. She came over to yell at my parents about my "addiction" to marijuana. When my parents told her to get lost, she called the cops and tried to get me arrested. FML

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

#20751757
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49775) - you deserved it (2842)

On 06/28/2013 at 1:16am - health - by not cool (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I went to a water park with a group of friends. As I went down the water slide, some complete turd waffle of a kid in the water kicked his leg out in line with my crotch. The moment I hit the bottom was the moment I think I became sterile. FML

#20709749
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42601) - you deserved it (3161)

On 06/06/2013 at 2:24pm - health - by fuck kids (man) - United States (New York)



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