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June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I got the bill for the flowers my husband arranged to be delivered to me while he's out of town next week. I also got the bill for the flowers he's sending to the floozy he'll be seeing next week while he's out of town. The gift tag for it was: "I can't wait to see you." FML

#20706851
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55674) - you deserved it (3476)

On 06/05/2013 at 1:02am - love - by Justme (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to walk home in the rain because my mom didn't want to get her new car wet. FML

#20705347
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56871) - you deserved it (3654)

On 06/04/2013 at 12:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while at my aunt's funeral, my grandma who has terrible memory loss asked me whose funeral we were at. I had to explain to her that her daughter had died. FML

#20702720
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82361) - you deserved it (3505)

On 06/03/2013 at 1:32am - misc - by Me - United States (Illinois)

Today, as I was getting out of my car, an old and obese lady walked up to me and called me an "inconsiderate heartless bitch" for using the last handicap parking spot. I guess she didn't see my wheelchair. FML

#20698730
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61227) - you deserved it (3024)

On 06/01/2013 at 2:21am - misc - by regstl - United States (Oregon)

Today, wanting to do something nice for my dad, I mowed the lawn. He grounded me for "emasculating" him. FML

#20699633
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47914) - you deserved it (4024)

On 06/01/2013 at 4:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, at my wedding, the minister forgot to skip the "does anyone object?" part. My mother stood up and gave a lengthy reason, which caused my future in-laws to start shouting. It turned into a small riot, and no, we're not married now. FML

#20721430
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64217) - you deserved it (3446)

On 06/12/2013 at 12:27pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at my job at my tattoo parlor, yet another client offered to pay for his tattoo by "letting" me sleep with him. This client happens to be my boyfriend's best friend, whose girlfriend is having me tattoo his name on her wrist next week. FML

#20735377
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49574) - you deserved it (3673)

On 06/19/2013 at 2:46pm - work - by notkatvond (woman) - United States

Today, my husband threw up on me during our wedding vows. FML

#20728616
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53624) - you deserved it (4132)

On 06/16/2013 at 12:54am - love - by fun (man) - United States

Today, my daughter believed that watching the Big Bang Theory would count as studying for her chemistry final. FML

#20733887
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43256) - you deserved it (6641)

On 06/18/2013 at 7:22pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my best friend called me a moron for disputing her belief that Canada is in South America. FML

#20729679
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43974) - you deserved it (3885)

On 06/16/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by not a brain cell in sight (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while life-guarding in a 55+ community, I greeted a man by saying: "Good morning Sir!" He responded with, "Cut the shit kid, I'm not that fucking old." FML

#20746882
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39517) - you deserved it (5511)

On 06/25/2013 at 5:45pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend found an empty snail shell. I tried messing with him by saying the snail had turned into a slug, like caterpillars turn into butterflies. He quickly replied, "Yeah I know. I'm not a tard, babe." and said he'd been taught all that and more back in school. What the hell? FML

#20741108
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42720) - you deserved it (6408)

On 06/22/2013 at 3:28pm - misc - by our kids will be derps (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to go to therapy for my fear of cats. All the way there, my girlfriend kept making cat noises and scratching at me. FML

#20748338
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40279) - you deserved it (7784)

On 06/26/2013 at 12:42pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)



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