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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, it's my birthday. Three people wished me happy birthday: Google, my insurance company, and the place I lease my car from. FML

#20649920
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52308) - you deserved it (3867)

On 05/08/2013 at 1:48pm - misc - by trice (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I heard noises outside my front door. I looked out through the window, only to see my boyfriend encouraging his dog to take a dump on my welcome mat. FML

#20663152
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41946) - you deserved it (4683)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:52pm - love - by wellokaythen (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I decided to end things with my boyfriend, thinking it would be fine since things have never been at all serious between us. He cried for hours before having his grandmother text me to say how heartless I am. FML

#20654207
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41947) - you deserved it (7850)

On 05/10/2013 at 12:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway

Today, I'm so strapped for cash that I smuggled toilet paper out of my mother's house. FML

#20660573
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38059) - you deserved it (6669)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:16am - money - by psychopumpkin - United Kingdom (Lincolnshire)

Today, I went for an interview regarding a seasonal position I'd been offered at a grocery store. The manager showed up 45 minutes past the scheduled interview time, cheerfully greeted me, and took me back to his office, just to tell me that they don't hire seasonal help. Ever. FML

#20671268
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42016) - you deserved it (3375)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:36pm - work - by ineedayob (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41773) - you deserved it (14364)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I went to visit my sister, who lives four hours away from me. I'd only just sat down on their couch when her husband told me I needed to leave so they could have sex. FML

#20666985
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42662) - you deserved it (3125)

On 05/16/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by earplugsplease (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I registered on an irritable bowel support group, unknowingly linking it to my Facebook wall. FML

#20666712
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37450) - you deserved it (9981)

On 05/16/2013 at 6:51am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, a friend was put on suicide watch when her parents wouldn't pay $500 for a premium senior picture package. FML

Today, I'm planning my big sister's wedding. My long-term, live-in boyfriend walked by and saw me looking at the wedding tab on Pinterest, smirked, and said, "Don't get your hopes up." I had. FML

#20674650
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49499) - you deserved it (7431)

On 05/20/2013 at 12:47am - love - by ForeverAlone (woman) - United States

Today, I got a call from work stating that my employment was being terminated. This was after being suspended while they investigated my sexual harassment claim. Their reason for firing me: misuse of company time. Yes, I suppose reporting being sexually harassed is a huge waste of time. FML

#20681249
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46308) - you deserved it (4320)

On 05/23/2013 at 3:24am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my mom accused my cat of being a "manipulator", and said that we should get rid of him. FML

#20683274
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34280) - you deserved it (4171)

On 05/24/2013 at 3:04am - animals - by seriously - United States

Today, I learned that binding my stomach with duct tape isn't worth it to look thin. I also learned the even worse part when I shrieked more loudly than I should've when I tried to discreetly rip it off in history class. FML



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