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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML

#20670402
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49246) - you deserved it (5038)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:57am - misc - by Chelsea - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my teenage daughter nearly burned down our house because she wanted to take "artsy" pictures with a lighter for Instagram. FML

#20656774
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49540) - you deserved it (5756)

On 05/11/2013 at 5:19pm - kids - by failure as a parent (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML

#20692945
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46728) - you deserved it (3460)

On 05/29/2013 at 11:21am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my cell phone bill was much higher than normal. After investigating, I realized that a text conversation I had with my stalker, telling him multiple times not to contact me anymore, was to an international cell phone. I have to pay to be stalked. FML

#20666438
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46426) - you deserved it (6007)

On 05/16/2013 at 12:31am - money - by astalkerindeed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was my very last day teaching my dance class. After the class ended, the owner of the studio started clapping and told all my students to give me a hug. No one hugged me. No one. FML

#20691616
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43699) - you deserved it (5093)

On 05/28/2013 at 6:14pm - work - by funnygirl018 - United States

Today, a group of guys came into my restaurant, dressed up in some kind of role-playing game clothing. Apparently I pronounced one of their fake elf names wrong, because the guy complained to my manager, who then bitched me out in front of everyone for upsetting the customers. FML

#20685944
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43841) - you deserved it (4390)

On 05/25/2013 at 6:13pm - work - by leela (woman) - United States

Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML

#20696605
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55767) - you deserved it (3196)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:20am - love - by wtf mom - United States (California)

Today, I was forced to work with someone I absolutely hate. I then found myself starting to like him, until he shot me in the forehead with a stapler gun. FML

#20639773
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47291) - you deserved it (4284)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:30pm - work - by annoyedgirl - United States (Washington)

Today, my boss asked me to read through a document. I gave my feedback, saying it seemed like it had been written by an 8-year-old. Turns out it was in fact written by him. FML

#20649842
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41022) - you deserved it (14738)

On 05/08/2013 at 12:59pm - work - by anon_1996 - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML

#20635835
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49395) - you deserved it (2293)

On 05/01/2013 at 9:52pm - work - by Paul (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML

#20645667
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53499) - you deserved it (8785)

On 05/06/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by stretchy - United States (Maryland)

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend. Being the mature one, I went up to her and said, "Hey, how's it going?" She maced me and kept walking. FML

#20644793
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47417) - you deserved it (10425)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:06am - misc - by wat_dafuq_bro (man) -

Today, my new neighbor moved in. Because she was fairly young, I offered to mow her grass whenever it needed cut. Her dad then tried to start a fight with me because he thought it was sexual come-on. FML

#20663640
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39221) - you deserved it (6534)

On 05/14/2013 at 7:52pm - misc - by Brenden - United States (Ohio)



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