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April 2013

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Today , I brougt a girl ome from a bar. Ting were getting ot an eavy wen se askd if I ad a condom. I opend ma wallet to grab te one I keep in tere , only to fine te empty wrapper in its place; it was te only one I ad. It seems drunk me is a bigger jerk tan I tougt. fat FML

#20570299
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18894) - you deserved it (42058)

On 04/01/2013 at 5:00pm - intimacy - by Marco (man) - United States

Today, washing machine broke down, within its warranty. I asked neighbour if she could open the door for the mechanic while I was at work; she agreed. When I cummed home, I had a bill for 80 bucks for not opening the door. Her reason? She was busy watching her favorite TV show. FML

#20573502
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32235) - you deserved it (4604)

On 04/03/2013 at 5:40pm - money - by Jack -

today husband told me to look 4 a honeymoon resort, since we had to cancel it last year . I looked everything up and got all excited . Just when I asked him 4 payment information, he said "April Fools!" April Fools was two days ago . FML

#20573157
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37228) - you deserved it (3165)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:50pm - love - by letdown13 - United States (New York)

TODAY... SUFFERING FROM SEVERE MORNING SICKNES FOLLOWED BY CRAVING FIR SALTY FOOD... I HAD STACKED OUR FRIDGE WITH YUMMY SNACKS. WHEN FINALLY EMERGING FROM OUR BATHROOM AFTER RETCHING THIS MORNING... I FOUND OUT MY HUSBAND HAD EATEN ALL MY SNACK THE NIGHT BEFORE. FAT FML

#20571483
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32535) - you deserved it (3901)

On 04/02/2013 at 11:04am - health - by moosemay (woman) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, mah girlfriend said that while she was playing volleyball, her looool whole life flashd before her eyes. According to her grandmother, mah girlfriend is now psychic. She completely believes it. FML

#20574330
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29967) - you deserved it (3116)

On 04/04/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by CrazyBitch - United States (California)

Today, mother accused me of stealing pills; she looked all over room an couldn't find them. When she went back to the pantry, she saw them on the shelf below where they were supposed to be. She then accused me of putting them there while she was searching room. FML

#20594384
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42433) - you deserved it (2561)

On 04/15/2013 at 6:11pm - misc - by MyLifeSucks (man) - United States (Texas)

TODAY, I POPPED A PIMPLEHILE STOPPED AT A RED LIGHT!! WHEN I LOOKED OVER THE WOMAN IN THE CAR NEXT TO ME WAS LAUGHING, AN HAD HER CAMERA PHONE OUT!! MEGA FML

#20627066
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39947) - you deserved it (15458)

On 04/28/2013 at 6:28am - health - by msarosi - Canada (Ontario)

Today , I had to sell over $400 worth of china at a flea market. I barely got paid enough to refill my gas tank. fat FML

#20588597
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34456) - you deserved it (7448)

On 04/13/2013 at 6:53pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend's parents were out of town, so I stayd the night, hoping for some fun. Somehow, we startd talking about conspiracy theories, and she spent the next half hour ranting at me about how Osama bin Laden is really still alive. real FML

#20586667
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44890) - you deserved it (14297)

On 04/12/2013 at 4:17pm - intimacy - by InDisbelief (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today... I was given a powerful laxative to clear me out. I can't go to the bathroom because the four guests of my sleeping roommate are looool all sitting in dead silence against the paper-thin bathroom wall. FML

#20597317
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34141) - you deserved it (3556)

On 04/16/2013 at 7:13pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today ma ten-year-old sister ad to write out ma job application cuz no one can read ma terrible andwriting . fat FML

#20628506
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22235) - you deserved it (34966)

On 04/28/2013 at 7:40pm - work - by AbhorrentApplication (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I came back to ma dorm to find ma roommate forgot to get rid of er massive amounts of ceese before break. Se did, owever, remember to unplug te refrigerator. FML

#20569021
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27837) - you deserved it (1744)

On 03/31/2013 at 8:45pm - misc - by roomatewoes (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, is the day of the biggest concert in the state of Florida, and it's also my brthday. I was so excited to hear my mom got tickets. It was for her boyfriend and her. I'm stuck at home babysitting. FML

#20589773
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54662) - you deserved it (4094)

On 04/14/2013 at 9:29am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



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