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April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my friends and I were exchanging stories with one another. I barely got a few sentences in before they started mocking and viciously insulting me for saying "swaggered", claiming it comes from the slang term "swag", and that they never thought I was a "dumbass hipster". Really now? FML

#20582400
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33178) - you deserved it (6853)

On 04/09/2013 at 5:04pm - misc - by nice education you've got there (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went for a run, and my own dog attacked me. FML

#20585643
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38399) - you deserved it (9225)

On 04/11/2013 at 8:59pm - animals - by anyonmus - United States (Maryland)

Today, I took multiple pictures of my blanket and pillow pet, trying to get the "perfect pose" so I could post it on Facebook with a cheesy joke. I'm 30. FML

#20578784
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14721) - you deserved it (39890)

On 04/07/2013 at 8:07am - misc - by kimhinesvoinea - United States

Today, I went to work at a hotel. One of the guests decided to play the piano in the lobby. He's deaf. Unfortunately, I'm not. FML

#20575584
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30570) - you deserved it (6370)

On 04/05/2013 at 12:20am - work - by torturedears (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my English teacher used the word "interpretate" again. This isn't the only mistake she's made though; I've been so frustrated that I've started a list of them. It's over a page long. I'm meant to be learning things from this woman. FML

#20582580
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34283) - you deserved it (3892)

On 04/09/2013 at 7:09pm - work - by Annoyed Student - United Kingdom (Oxfordshire)

Today, I was on a plane in the aisle seat; the guy in the middle was encroaching on my space, and the window seat was not taken. The stewardess noticed my discomfort and suggested the guy move so we both had space. He had bought both seats and "liked sitting in the middle." FML

#20574297
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34911) - you deserved it (2108)

On 04/04/2013 at 3:12am - misc - by Claustrophobic - United States

Today, I started my new job as a mail carrier. One of my assigned roads was Milbrooke Street, which I'd never heard of. After driving around for ages trying to find it, I called for directions. The street doesn't exist in my city; it's just the boss' way of seeing how stupid you are. FML

#20584939
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34237) - you deserved it (7852)

On 04/11/2013 at 12:18pm - work - by Directionally challenged - United States

Today, I got the chance to speak to some of the top academics in my field. I was so hungover that I couldn't remember the title of the Masters degree I've spent two years studying for, let alone make intelligent comments. I'm pretty sure the only thing I got right was my name. FML

#20588088
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13524) - you deserved it (100318)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:26pm - misc - by could be an fml commenter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband laughed at me for farting in the bathtub; I lied by admitting to it. The fact is that I have enough back-fat to create suction against the bathtub. FML

#20618145
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41551) - you deserved it (16070)

On 04/24/2013 at 11:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I got so drunk I called my ex-boyfriend and confessed my love to him. All in front of my current boyfriend. FML

#20613766
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20257) - you deserved it (69708)

On 04/22/2013 at 6:31pm - love - by Out from Hell (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after 2 months of my new neighbours' kids throwing rocks at our cars, constantly swearing at us, bullying my siblings in and out of school, and vandalising our property, their mother has convinced the landlord that we're the ones out of control. FML

#20620825
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45767) - you deserved it (2331)

On 04/25/2013 at 1:56pm - misc - by neighbour hell - Norway (Vest-Agder)

Today, I had a job interview. Everything was going well until I noticed a picture of a dog hanging on the wall, which reminded me of the ending of Marley and Me. I started crying and had to be escorted out. FML

#20585994
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20198) - you deserved it (74585)

On 04/12/2013 at 1:58am - misc - by crybaby (man) - United States (New York)

Today, for the first time, I told my girlfriend of two months that I love her. She broke down in laughter and mockingly asked, "What are you, some kind of queer?" I could've sworn she was mentally older than a 5-year-old when I asked her out. I guess not. FML

#20586776
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43181) - you deserved it (11628)

On 04/12/2013 at 5:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)



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